Organization Origins
by A.D. Williams
Summary: Saix is content with his average-Joe life. His roommate Xemnas on the other hand...not so much. When he decides to gather together a group of Nobodies with only a half thought-out plan, Saix can see it burning on the horizon; chaos! Let the mayhem begin.
1. Brainstorming

Ah, my first long KH story. The inspiration for this came from the Deviantart artists ladychimera and nire-chan and their silly KH comics. Now, having said that, I don't want you guys to think I totally bummed things from them, lol! The idea for silly nicknames was inspired by them and it also helped me to be able to write such serious characters in a crazy way! Props to 'em!

Also, a friend of mine wanted me to go back to writing the same way I did when I first started out (*thinks of the old Inuyasha stories and shudders*). But…considering this actually earned their approval and I liked it myself, I'll continue on with this story! Hope you guys enjoy it!

EDIT 3-7-10: This story is of course finished now, but I might want to warn you that Saix' personality in this first chapter is pretty…awkward. Forgive me, since my first chapter of nearly all my stories have more OOC-ness than even I can stand. He'll straighten out later though, so don't let this discourage you!

Disclaimer: I, in no way, own anything KH related. Although I would love to find an Axel plushie somewhere…

**

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Xemnas + His Brainstorming = A Headache for Saix**

"Saix, I need your help with something," Xemnas said to him one day at breakfast. Saix put down his bagel and set aside his newspaper to give him a dull look.

"Yes? What is it this time?" he said, letting the barest hints of sarcasm seep through his voice.

If Xemnas detected it, he ignored it. "I think I want to get together a group of like-minded people, a group of…Nobodies, as we've been called. Together, I'm sure we can come up with a way to become…um, Somebody's, or…something like that."

"I see," Saix said, picking up the paper again and continuing his reading.

"I'm serious!" Xemnas shouted. "Think about it! To have a heart! To care! To love! To feel passion and emotions! Isn't that the point of being human?"

_Funny, I don't need a heart to know I made a mistake when I became your roommate, _Saix thought. "Look, that all sounds great and lovely but c'mon. Do you really believe there is a way to become a whole person again? Trying to make something out of nothing? Leave it be."

Xemnas's eyes grew wide and when Saix looked up, it seemed as though he were trying to give him…puppy eyes?! Large golden orbs filled with tears blinked at him. "You…you think…we should remain Nobodies?" he whimpered.

Oh no. "Well…we are what we are. It can't be helped," Saix said, trying to shrug off the effect the man's eyes were having. Damnit, he hated when Xemnas got like this! It was only a matter of time before he caved. It was how he ended up agreeing to share an apartment with the man. And the unfortunate thing about living with a person who lived off their random whims was that their ideas rarely paid any bills!

"But…Saix…" Oh gods, he'd just said his name…in that whimpering voice. No…must…resist…

Aw, to hell with it!

Saix ran to him like a little child and hugged him. "It's okay, Xemmy! We'll try out your idea! In fact, why didn't I think of it?"

"Thank you, Saix!" Xemnas squealed and squeezed the man back so hard that Saix's face started to turn as blue as his hair.

Somewhere in the continuous snuggle-fest they were having, Saix had the impression that he'd soon regret that he agreed to another one of his ideas.

- - -

"Okay, the plan has been set in motion!" Xemnas said to him a few days later.

"Dare I ask what you mean by that?" Saix muttered.

"Oh, don't sound so droll, my good sir! I've been out promoting our new group!" Xemnas shouted, twirling gaily around the room with eyes now full of hopeful stars.

Drama queen much?

"And do tell me, oh brilliant one, how exactly have you been promoting?" Saix asked.

Xemnas stopped his twirling for a moment and put a finger to his mouth in thought. "Well…I made some flyers and passed them out. I put them up in every store I came to as well. I even interrupted poetry night at Starbucks to make an announcement about it. But I did it in a cool, poetic way, so it fit right in."

Saix blinked. Xemnas and poetry? Well, he was dramatic…wouldn't be too much of a stretch to start rhyming as well. "Alright. What did the flyers say?"

"Here, let me show you one."

Saix took the paper he handed him. On a bright orange sheet he read:

**Needed: Nobodies**

**Looking for heartless individuals interested in finding their hearts. Actual Heartless are not included. **

**No previous work experience needed, although if you are skilled with manipulating the elements or have weaponry training, that would be better.**

**Meeting to be held at: (**theirhome address was listed, along with that day's date**)**

**Time: 4:00 PM**

**Food and refreshments provided. **

Saix face-palmed. "Let me get this straight. You're inviting an unspecified amount of strangers into our home? People that are coming totally off the streets, ones you've never met before and have no heart meaning no conscious and could possibly be murderers or something?"

Xemnas gave a chuckle. "I guess I never thought of it like that, heh-heh."

_Great. We're fucking screwed. _Saix shook his head in disbelief.

"Aw, Saix, don't look so down!" Xemnas said, again hugging his friend close to him. "Hey, I wield the power of nothingness! I have control over all! I'm not gonna let a single person lay a finger on you!"

_I'm not the one you should be worried about, _Saix grumbled. _You and your stupidity are what's in danger. _He looked at his watch. It was already 3:30. Then something occurred to him. "There's not a single item of refreshment in this house. Shouldn't you be out shopping or something?"

"Oh, they'll be alright," Xemnas said, tidying up the living room. "Besides, it's their first test. Let's see who came for the food and who's here because they actually want to help my plan come to fruition."

Holy snaps, that actually sounded half intelligent.

"Oh, and Saix, would you please use a coaster when you drink in here? You'll leave water stains otherwise."

The blue-haired man gritted his teeth. Oh yes, he definitely need his own place.

A little after four, the guests started trudging through the door. Putting on his best host face, Xemnas brightly greeted everyone as they came in. Saix on the other hand tried to remain as invisible as he could be as he sat in a distant armchair.

He stared at the people as they made themselves comfortable on the seats. Some of these people weren't even human! What the fuck was that thing in the green?! Was that a rat?!

After the last person had rushed in—some weird, bright red-headed guy that looked like a porcupine on fire—Xemnas shut the door and addressed everyone there. "Welcome to my humble abode! I hope everyone is comfy. Okay, getting to business, I'd like to discuss the finer points of my plan with you—" His talking was cut off as someone raised their hand. "Um, yes?"

"Ish there gonna bwee any fwood?" The person asked. This was another oddity that Saix had noticed. It was a speaking duck.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that," Xemnas said.

"I said, ish there gonna bwee any fwood?" The duck repeated, getting a bit belligerent.

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask that you spit out whatever it is that's in your mouth," Xemnas told him.

"Aw, fwooey!" The duck spat and got up, waddling out of the apartment and mumbling to himself as he went. The rat-looking thing got up with him.

Oh wait, that was a dog. Saix's mistake.

"Er, alrightie then," Xemnas said. "Okay, first order of business, are there any Heartless here?"

Everyone raised their hands.

Xemnas groaned, then scrutinized the crowd. "You there, the ant thing. I think you're a classic Heartless."

The small creature said nothing, but stared at him with wide bug-eyes. Was it really possible this thing had read his flyer?

"I said in my notice that I wasn't looking for ordinary Heartless. Do you have any special powers?" Xemnas asked.

The creature immediately sunk into the ground and began moving, like a portable puddle. It came up short next to Xemnas and then solidified into its normal self again.

"Yes, that's nothing new. Nearly all _normal _Heartless can do that. Do you have any other special skills?"

The thing seemed to ponder his question for a moment, then reached out a clawed hand and scratched his pants. It barely tore the fabric.

Xemnas frowned. "Get out."

The Heartless sunk into a puddle again and swiftly slid under the front door.

"Okay, any _other _normal Heartless here?" The rest of the room looked at each other and shrugged, mumbling amongst themselves.

"Alright, now I can continue. It has come to my attention that we, Nobodies, were once, um…Somebody or something like that. We too deserve to have a heart. I can barely hold a job because I'm seen as being too…heartless!" Xemnas did a dramatic swooning motion and Saix sunk lower in his seat, trying to cover himself up with another newspaper. _No, _that's _why you can't hold a job, _he mentally corrected.

The silver-haired man recovered and went on. "Legends foretell of a mystical force called Kingdom Hearts that has the power to give men unlimited power. I believe this power is the key to our becoming whole again, but still separate from the people we were in our past lives. So, are you with me?"

Another person raised their hand, a guy with hair as pink as _Naruto_'s Sakura. "Uh, yeah. So you're asking us to dedicate our time and energy to finding a fairy-tale power that only _might _make us whole again?"

Xemnas fidgeted. "Well, uh, you see…"

"That's what I'm talkin' about! Sign me up!" The guy shouted. Everyone else joined him, nodding enthusiastically.

Xemnas's eyes brightened, filling with tears. "Oh goody! I even have our group name picked out! How's Organization XIII sound?"

Suddenly the room fell silent. Soft coughs could be heard in the quietness.

Another person raised their hand, some blondish young guy. "Hey, there's over thirteen of us here. And we're not going to vote on the name?"

Oh, a wisecrack, Saix snickered from behind his paper.

"No, we're not voting on the name," Xemnas said. "My club, er, group, so it's my title. And screw it; we'll wing it with the name no matter how many members we have. Alright, another order of business. I've also taken it upon myself to design our outfits. Voila!"

Grabbing his clothes, he ripped them off of him to reveal a floor length leather cloak of some sort. Saix actually blinked in shock. How in the hell was it physically possible to hide that outfit under his normal clothes?!

"This here will be the usual attire for the Organization," Xemnas said. "Everyone will pitch in for the fabric; I know an excellent seamstress that makes the most dashing attires!"

_He's going gay again…_Saix rolled his eyes.

"So, I suppose the next thing we should do is introduce ourselves. Forgive my rudeness for not having said this earlier. I'm Xemnas, your lord, master, and leader of the Org. Over there in the corner, hiding behind that newspaper, is my right-hand man, Saix."

Being put on the spot so suddenly, Saix for a moment clutched his paper in fear. Very slowly he lowered it just enough for his eyes to be shown, gave a small wave, and immediately erected the barrier back up again.

The blonde guy stood up first. "The name's Demyx. I'm a water bender."

Two young children in the crowd snickered at the _Avatar _reference. The blonde went on.

"I'm also pretty skilled with my sitar and I'm not afraid to kick ass and take names with it." He directed this last part to the two children.

After sitting down, a burly man stood up. Ugh, what was with all that hair on his face?! "I go by the name Xaldin," he said. Then he did a flashy move with a long blue lance, bowed, and sat back down again.

"Er, right…next?" Xemnas said.

A blonde woman stood up. "Heh, looks like I'm the only woman here," she said, flipping her hair in a prissy way.

"I'm a girl too," one of the children said defiantly.

The woman stared at her for a moment. "I'm the only woman here," she repeated. "And the name's Larxene. Mess with me and I'll cut all your dicks off," she said, casually tossing a knife in the air. The last time she did this, she looked up and gave the room an evil grin.

_Someone needs to get laid, _Saix threw in from his hidden spot.

Next person to go was a bluish-haired person. Standing up and not looking at anything in particular, he said, "Zexion," in a very bored voice, and then sat back down again. No weaponry introduction or anything.

_Cliché emo. _(I believe we've established that basically all thoughts belong to Saix, eh?)

A few other people introduced themselves in quick succinct. A short-haired redhead with harsh features named Lexaeus (_All brawns and absolutely no brains) _a long-haired blonde named Vexen (_My gods that is the most strained smile I have ever seen on someone!)_, some guy with a patch over his eye named Xigbar (_Arrgh!), _an older blonde man named Luxord (_Total hustler and player) _and the pink-haired guy who went by the name Marluxia (_Gender confused). _

The last three people were the spiky redhead head and the kids. The redhead stood up first. "The name's Axel, got it memorized?"

"Axel was it?" Xemnas said. Axel gave him a scornful look. "Do continue; tell us a bit about yourself."

"I was going to, if you'd just shut up," Axel muttered quietly. Out loud he said, "I use the ancient weapon first created in India called chakrams, although mine…well, they're quite different, ha ha," He laughed at his own joke. "And I have the ever-popular power of fire. Up for a barbeque anyone?"

The room was silent for a moment until a quiet "Booo!" from behind Saix's newspaper could be heard. The porcupine sat down, looking a bit put out.

Heh…fire…put out…heh-heh…

The last two people, the children, stood together. "I'm Roxas," the boy said. "And I'm Xion," the girl introduced herself.

"And we're the Wonder Twins!" Demyx shouted out.

The two ignored him. "We both have the power of, um…Keyblades…" Roxas said. "And we, uh, defeat Heartless with them…and stuff…"

"You sound like an old friend of mine," said another person suddenly. In the deepest corner of the room, everyone had failed to notice the last individual. A silver-haired boy looked over at the two standing children with the tiniest flair of life in his eyes. "I had a friend that spoke like you. Somewhat looked like you too. Oh, the name's Riku by the way." He lifted only one finger in greeting, then fell silent. His eyes lost what little spark was in them.

"O-kay then…" Xemnas said. "Well, wasn't today progressive! We'll meet again next week at the same time. Saix, would you pass around a sheet of paper and a pen for everyone to write their contact info on?"

Saix threw down his newspaper and leveled him with the fiercest glare he could manage. "What?! No, you're closer."

"Aw, Saixy! Pleeeeeeeeeeease?"

"No. And don't call me that degrading name."

"I always call you Saixy!"

"Pfft, to hell you do! And it sounds too close to sexy."

"Well, I suppose you're that too."

Saix shot out of his chair so fast that it fell over behind him. "Where do we keep the damn paper and pens?" He growled. Xemnas beamed at him.

And thus was the first meeting of the so-called Organization 13 which actually had 15 members. As Saix sent the supplies around to each member, he was dismayed that so many had bought into Xemnas's half-baked plan. No telling how long this idea would span out.

And yet again it didn't involve paying a single damn bill! Saix honestly wanted to cry from the unfairness of it all.

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Sorry for the length, there was a bit too much that I wanted to cram in this first chapter. Anywho, please be kind and review!


	2. The Starting LineUp

You know, I've always known me and debit cards were a horrible thing. That tiny piece of plastic allows me to buy just about anything I want online…which is why I'm now roughly $16 poorer because I had the lovely spontaneous idea to buy an Axel plushie! But he was too adorable…it's like he was calling out to me! Now I just need him a half-decent buddy…Roxas is the obvious choice, but Cloud Strife wouldn't be bad either, ^_^

Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy the chapter!

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**The Starting Line-Up**

The next Organization meeting wasn't really a meeting so much as a field-trip of sorts. They were going to Xemnas' preferred tailor to be measured for their cloaks.

"I feel like what Harry Potter must've felt when Madam Malkin measured him for his school robes!" Demyx gushed. "We're even going to wear black ones like him too!"

"Okay, for the record, Harry Potter is on a crash-course of being extinct once those movies are finished," Marluxia said, standing next to him as both held their arms out for assistants to run around them with tape measurers. "And grow up, what adult still watches Harry Potter?"

Lexaeus gave a little cough from his seat over in the small waiting area, but said nothing.

Once those two were finished, Xigbar and Zexion stepped up next. The others watched as the routine was started again, swift hands taking quick calculations.

"Ya know, this kinda makes_ me_ feel like royalty," Xigbar said.

"Mm," Zexion replied, keeping his eyes ahead of him.

"I'm gonna assume you're one of those quite-types, eh?"

"Mm," the guy said again.

"I'll talk to ya, Xiggy!" Demyx said, hopping in front of him with shining blue eyes.

"Ugh, on that note, I'll be quiet too," Xigbar muttered. Demyx's shoulders sagged and he shuffled back over to his seat again and flopped down.

A week later, the group was called back to the shop for a first-round fitting.

"Stick me again with that needle, and I'm singeing your eyebrows off," Axel warned as a tailor attempted to adjust the cloth of the cloak with pins.

He glanced over to Saix, who stood next to him, looking like he seriously wanted to be anywhere else but there.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" Axel asked him.

"I seriously hope not," the man muttered.

_Maybe I'll singe _his _eyebrows off. _"Darshin University, '02. I think I remember seeing you at a self-help seminar. "

Saix gasped and rounded on him, making the tailor groan in aggravation. "For the record, I was only there to audit it! I wasn't actually trying to walk away believing in that stuff like I needed it or something."

"Hey man, nothing wrong with a bit of self-help advice!" Axel chuckled. "That's why I was there. Unfortunately, I was a Nobody back then too, so self-help for us given by an actual person is kinda pointless."

"Aww, did my little Saixy need some help?" Xemnas said, walking up to him and pinching his cheek. Saix could hear the other Organization members snickering.

"I was only there to watch," he gritted out. "I do _not _have issues!"

"Actually, 97% of people have some sort of issue or another with their selves," Vexen put in. "I personally would like to up that to 100%, but I've not done the research yet. One second." Seemingly out of nowhere, he pulled out an abacus and began muttering to himself as he played with it.

Axel's tailor finally stood up and stepped away from him. "There. How does that fit?"

"Well, let's see," he said. Holding his arms out to the side, he gathered his energy in his hands and conjured his chakrams. "Hm, doesn't feel bad. Nice material. And black helps bring out my eyes. Yeah, I think I like this—"

He was cut off as a chakram caught on his sleeve. A ripping sound was heard and then the room was filled with the metallic scent of blood.

"Oh dear god, no Axel!!!" Demyx screamed. "Don't slit your wrists! You have every reason to live! Live I tell you, liiiiiiiiiive!!!!"

"Okay, who the hell here is about to be his buddy? Cause is sure ain't gonna be me!" Axel said to the room at large. When no one claimed him, his future flashed before his eyes. Demyx was going to be the Orgs nuisance. Innocent at heart and only wanting to be friends, but a bother nonetheless. Why the hell had he joined the Organization again?!

He sighed. "Make the sleeves less baggy," he said, letting the tailor adjust the cloth some more.

Two weeks after this incident, Xemnas called yet another meeting, this time using a nearby school gym for the location.

"Alright men, " Xemnas said.

"I'm a lady," Larxene corrected him.

Xemnas stared at her for a moment. "Alright men, the clothes have arrived." He turned to the stack of black cloth in front of him on the last row of bleachers. He himself stood on the floor addressing the others.

"Okay, this one is…Luxord's."

Like some sort of sports star, when his name was called, Luxord jumped up screaming "WHOOOO! YEAH! LET'S DO THIS!!!!!!!" He then leapt to the floor, grabbed his robe and ran out onto the court, waving it around his head, still shouting.

For the first time, Xemnas had a feeling that maybe he'd made a mistake with this group thing. More importantly, perhaps he should've screened his applicants.

"Xaldin," He called out. The burly man quietly stepped down, took his robe and bowed to him.

"Um, you're not exactly in Japan anymore, you don't have to do that," Xemnas said, but the man was already walking away to join Luxord. "Er, alright then. Marluxia."

Marluxia took his while talking on his cellphone. "Dude, she had the biggest tits I think I've ever seen! I mean, screw the cow, hook me up to her!" By the time he reached their leader, the man was holding the outfit out as far as he could and with only two fingers, shuddering in disgust when the man passed by him.

"Roxas."

The boy got up, tripped over his own feet and came to a crashing halt at the bottom of the bleachers. "I meant to do that," he muttered, yet whispered 'ow' with every step he took.

"Remember to lift your feet up when walking, got it memorized?" Axel called after him.

In truth, Roxas wanted to flick him off, but he held back.

"Xion," Xemnas called next. Daintily, she hopped down and took her robe, offering a bright smile to the man. A semblance of normalcy in the group!

"Hussy," Larxene snorted.

"Larxene."

She stepped down, having to pass over Axel to get to the floor. As she did, she made sure to trail a finger across his chest.

"In another life, that might've been arousing," he said to her. "You got to me a little too late." She huffed and stomped over to Xemnas, snatched her robe and continued her pounding to the others on the court.

"Fee fi fo fum!" Demyx snorted. "I sense the aura of a disgruntled woman!"

The names went on, and finally, Xemnas was the last one, saving his own for the end. He slipped his robe on over his clothes and turned to look at the others. On first sight, he nearly cried in joy.

14 black-cloaked figures stood before him. The quiet guy Riku seemed to be standing a bit away from the others, but otherwise it was a perfect picture. So beautiful!

Until somewhere, a kid screamed. Oh. This particular school gym just happened to still be holding class when they'd walked in. Oops.

The room was filled with shouting and screams of "Stranger danger! Stranger danger!" as the kids ran around, trying to get away.

"No little kiddies, we're the good guys!" Xemnas said, chasing after the little boy who had rallied the cry.

"Xemnas, let's go!" Saix said, grabbing his arm and dragging him away. The other Org members had already bolted.

They finally paused to catch their breath about ten blocks from the school. "Xemnas, you can't just walk up to kids, man. You don't look as friendly as you might've used to. People are scared of you. You can kill puppies by looking at them the wrong way!"

"No, not the puppies!" Xemnas cried, hugging himself tight and shaking his head back and forth.

Saix felt his cool demeanor slipping away, which seemed to happen from time to time when they were alone. "Xem, it was just an expression. Relax."

"You mean the puppies are safe?"

"Yes, the puppies are safe. As are we, thanks to my quick thinking. I think the Org might want to be an incognito thing. I don't know too many people who take a liking to groups of guys wearing all black."

"They did on _City of Angels,_" Xemnas pointed out as they started to head back to their apartment.

"That's because they had Nicholas Cage. It made all the difference."

"Ah. Okay. Thanks Saixy for cheering me up! I knew I was right in choosing you as my bff!"

Saix saw the incoming arms that spelled a hug and dodged them. He'd given him his daily dosage of softness or whatever. "Alright, enough of that! Now, we have our clothes, what's next on the list?"

"A safe house!" Xemnas said excitedly. Saix had to tug on his back to get him to stop skipping in public. "The other meeting places aren't safe and regrouping at home leaves the house so messy! My goodness, the amount dirt those people can track in!"

As they finally entered the apartment, the thought of Xemnas having perhaps been a woman in his past life crossed his mind. Or maybe someone's house-husband.

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Nothing much to say here. Please review!


	3. Riddle

Alright, chapter three is up and out! Do enjoy, ^_^

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**What's Black and Blue and White All Over?**

When Xemnas had spoken of needing a safe-house, Saix figured it was going to be some reconstructed crack-house that only he could see the worth in or something. Wasn't he quite shocked when the man had pranced up to him one day, saying in a sing-song voice, "I've found the perfect place! I've found the perfect place!"

"Alright, alright, enough of that!" He said irritably, swatting the man away. "Two-thirds of me really doesn't want to know exactly where this place is."

"But you have to!" Xemnas shouted. "You're my main guy! In fact, you're the first to know where it is! C'mon, I'll show you!"

Without waiting for an answer, Xemnas cast open a portal of dark matter on the side of a wall.

Saix froze. "To hell am I going into _that_!"

"But…it's the only way there!"

"Count me out, then."

Xemnas blinked for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. "Saix, I command you to do as I say."

Saix frowned. Oh, he was _not _trying to boss him around! "You don't control me," he said.

The room grew deathly silent.

The portal in the wall disappeared as Xemnas stepped closer. Saix refused to budge from the spot where his feet were planted. Without warning, another portal opened right behind him and Xemnas shoved him inside of it, stepped in himself and quickly sealed it off.

The area they now were in was a mixture of dark, swirling colors, like an evil hippie had designed the space. There was nothing else around except for a distant pinpoint of light.

And a group or two of Heartless.

"I got this," Xemnas said. Holding up his hand, a sphere of energy began to form. Soon it was glowing with a bright yellow light. Lowering his palm to where it faced straight ahead of him, he let the blasts go, wiping out the Heartless around them.

"There, problem solved!" He chirped. "C'mon. let's go!" He grabbed Saix's arm and pulled him toward the light. What seemed forever away was really quite close. Whiteness filled his vision and a moment later he felt concrete under his feet. The portal closed behind them, making the psychedelic realm disappear.

"Ahh, isn't she beautiful?" Xemnas said softly beside him. Saix finally took in his surrounding area. Everything was black. Was it night time here? In front of him was a very large structure, whitish for the most part with black and blue trimming.

"Xemnas…this is a castle," Saix said.

"I know! Perfect for the Organization! There's plenty of space for all of us to even live here too!"

"Where the hell did you get the funding for this place?!"

"Well…why do you think I haven't been paying the bills?"

Saix could've strangled him. "You mean you've been hoarding away your money to buy _this?! _Impossible! You couldn't have made enough wages to pay this off!"

Xemnas was quiet for a moment, scratching his head. Then he said, "Well, hey, it's better than that tiny apartment! Let's go check it out!"

_Is it me or did he just dodge the issue? _Saix wondered. He followed him inside, the first room being…very white.

"Wow…you know how they say you should wear sunglasses when out in the snow on a very sunny day? I think the same rule applies for being in here. Did this place used to be a mental heath care facility or something?"

Xemnas shrugged. "I don't know. The guy sold it to me cheap when I asked about the property. I wasn't going to question about the place."

Saix blanched. This could very well be the site of some gruesome murder or something! That's probably why it was so cheap!

"Hey, I want to show you our throne room!" Xemnas called from down a hallway.

Throne room?!

Saix followed him into a room off to the side but halted once in. Before him were over a dozen tall white pillars, on which sat, well…a throne. He noticed that one stood much higher than the others.

"Let me guess, yours, oh great one?" he asked.

Xemnas nodded. "Naturally. Gotta pull rank somehow."

"How the hell do we get up there?!"

"Jump, silly!" And thus Xemnas leapt daintily into his chair and sat down. "Hey Saix-papi*, you look like an ant way down there! Come on up, the view is fantastic!"

Usually the blue-haired man liked to put on appearances that he was no different than any other human being. For this brief moment though, he ignored that and teleported to a throne next to Xemnas's. Great view eh? It was nothing more than a better angle of more whiteness.

"Comfy, huh?" Xemnas asked, shaking his bottom in the chair like a cat settling into a spot.

"What could this castle have been used for beforehand for there to be such a room as this?" Saix wondered.

"Aw, you think too much! Let's go check out more of the place!" Xemnas teleported to the ground this time as well and walked out of the room, leaving Saix to run after him.

They checked out the entire structure for the most part. There were a total of five floors with indoor and outdoor walkways to each one. Each floor had a mini kitchen and on the third floor was a major kitchen. Saix lost count of how many bedrooms there were.

And all of it was the color of bird shit.

"As a way to get everyone involved, I'll let the other members decorate it," Xemnas told him as they were walking around the castle grounds. "That way it'll feel more like home to them!"

"So you really are intending to just uproot them from their daily lives for…this Kingdom Hearts thing?" Saix raised an eyebrow at him.

The other man shrugged. "Last time I checked, as a Nobody, you don't have a life."

"Oh, gee, thanks!" Saix snapped.

"Well, I actually meant that in terms of we're not supposed to be alive, but in your case, yeah, you have no life. When was the last time you got out and just did something? You go to work, you come home, you read or something and then you hit the sack. I know we're not supposed to exist, but, and I do mean this seriously, live a little!" Xemnas clapped him on the back, grinning broadly.

Saix frowned at him. "Oh? And exactly what would you suggest I do?"

Xemnas's smile grew even bigger. "You're a virgin, aren't you? Wait, no, that doesn't count…I'm one too. Well…half."

Saix stared at him in horror. Did he really want to know why he was only half a virgin?! _No…no I do not. _

"Okay man, here's the deal! We're moving into this place tomorrow, so tonight is going to be something like your bachelor party. Before you move into this place, you're going to get a taste of the wild side! Oh gods, I sound like that guy Marluxia…" Xemnas mused. "Anyways! I think getting you drunk shall suffice."

"You know, for being the leader and all, you sure are trying to ruin your subordinates," Saix told him. Without really thinking about it, he created a portal similar to the one they'd used to get there. Still speaking to Xemnas, he stepped through. "I don't drink and if I'm going to be your ever-useful assistant, then I think I should take the job with a clear head, not fighting off a hangover from the night before."

As they stepped back into their apartment, Xemnas tried to protest. "Okay, maybe not getting drunk, but something! Let's go see a movie!"

"Pfft, with you?!" Saix fell over laughing. "Yeah, you'd want to see something totally…gay! And I mean that in the more hip version of gay, not homosexual gay. But yeah, that too. Something like…_Mama Mia._"

"HEY! That was an awesome movie! Take it back!"

"Tch, I hate musicals! Which is why I believe Zac Effron and Vanessa Hudgens can both rot in—"

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Xemans cut him off. "I'm starting to think that maybe you really do need to get laid! You're so uptight!"

"And I'd like to stay that way, thank you," Saix said, heading down a hall. "I'm going to bed. Try to keep it down as you boo-hoo over _Broke-back Mountain _for the thirtieth time."

"There's more to it than sex you know!!!" Xemans shouted after him, but Saix slammed the door on his words.

Xemnas wasn't in the mood for movies that evening. As he got ready for bed, he thought back to the easier days of when they had hearts and had first met. It used to be so fun, doing experiments in Ansem's lab. Him, Sai**…Lea***…suddenly his eyes snapped open. Half the Org were assistants to Ansem! Even that emo kid!

His eyes grew bright and watery. Their meeting each other was nothing short of a family reunion!! This was fate, it had to have been!

He fell asleep dreaming of an Organization cook-out, everyone dressed in black as though they were holding an evil barbeque.

* * *

The first asterisk above was for the nickname that Xemnas used for Saix. Rather than actually using ladychimera's term of 'Saix puppy', I did a bit of looking around and found out that 'papi' I believe is another Japanese word for puppy, along with koinu. I'm not sure if that's a plural word though…it was only translated as puppy, not puppies.

The second set of asterisks above was about Saix's real name. I'm not fully sure what it is, but Sai seemed the most reasonable idea. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong though. The third set of asterisks was not because I don't know Axel's real name (Lea) but because I don't know if he was an assistant of Ansem's. I don't believe so. I mentioned it more as it being the way Saix and Axel first came to know each other, since from what I've read, it's been hinted that they knew each other before they were Nobodies. Then again, I could just as easily use the idea that they ran into each other at a self-help seminar! xD!

Well, besides all of this, please be kind and review! Feedback lets me know how I'm doing, ^_^


	4. Initiation

**Initiation**

It didn't take long for the word to be put out that the new HQ for the Organization was ready. The members flocked to the place a heck of a lot faster than Saix expected. And, to be honest, he was pissed that Xemnas' plan was actually working.

He watched as the young blonde guy walked between the tall brutish redhead and the quiet bluish haired boy. Demyx, Lexaeus and Zexion, was it? The latter two weren't saying anything. Demyx on the other hand seemed to be moving his mouth a mile a second as he poured out some sort of chatter.

In everyone's arms came luggage bags, suitcases, knapsacks, all sorts of things. Marluxia had somehow managed to get Xaldin and Vexen to carry a very large flat-screened TV into the place. Unfortunately for Vexen, he was a bit seasoned and the strain of carrying it looked like it was about to kill him. He occasionally shot hateful glares at Marluxia, who was texting away on his cell phone, not paying any attention to his servants.

Saix turned away from the window he was looking out of and decided to set up his own room. If nothing else, at least being the Superior's main guy meant that he got first dibs on things. His room had a clear view of the front and part of the side of the castle grounds. Silently, he thought it was even better than Xemnas'.

"Saix, there you are!" Speak of the devil…here he was. "Hey, I need you to make sure everything goes smoothly as everyone moves in. I know somebody is going to scrabble over space and I don't want things coming to blows."

Saix gave him a bland stare. "They're grown men. If they can't resolve their issues on their own, then we don't have any use for them."

"Please Saix?"

"What will you be doing?"

"Umm…gotta get some things ready…for something." With that, he disappeared out of the room. Again, Saix thought about how he was dodging and hiding things.

A small trip around the castle showed that everyone for the most part was moved in. Riku was for once displaying that perhaps he had some emotions by painting his room…black.__

_Never mind, I take that back, _Saix thought. _Would this qualify as emo still or is this trailing into goth? _

A peek into Luxord's room revealed that he had an overly-healthy fascination with women. Saix really wished he could've taken back seeing that blow-up doll in the corner.

Oh wait…it was just a mannequin. But still.

Larxene was doing a martial arts workout that was on a video. Except she was moving twice as fast as the instructor! Saix patiently waited for the woman to drop down from exhaustion, but when the instructor told everyone to take a break on the video, Larxene screamed "C'mon! I'm ready! Only little bitch's need breaks!!!"

Saix very quietly backed away.

Vexen looked all but dead as he panted from the exhaustion of carrying Marluxia's stuff up. He was splayed on his back, breathing loudly. Saix thought about how old he was and mentally chuckled at the idea of vultures hovering over him, knowing his time was coming soon.

Everyone else looked alive and well. Marluxia looked much better than the others though. Along with that big screen TV had come a surround-sound movie system, a large flat-panel computer, huge posters and wallscrolls of numerous sports stars and random anime (was it perhaps bad that Saix recognized the Hellsing one?) and…to add a bit of flair, a blue lava-lamp stood proudly on his bedside table.

Marluxia himself had a headset on as he played a racing video game at top notch volume, screaming at an unseen force about "Moving the fuck over" and "Get your piece of shit tin can out of my way." What was wrong with these people?!

The only ones that appeared to be socializing with each other were the children and the red-head. Axel….Lea.

_Axel, _Saix decided on. Lea was no more.

Well, his rounds were done. He still had some things he wanted to finish for his own room and thus began to head that way until he saw Xemnas. But he was way too noticeable of a person and the man spotted him immediately. Ugh…maybe he should invest in a haircut and some hair dye.

"Saixy, everything's ready! Call everyone to the throne room, wouldja?"

"Again, what will you be doing?" Saix asked him.

"I'll be there waiting, of course. It's unbefitting for the leader to play the messenger boy." And with that, he was gone again.

Saix growled low in his throat, curling his hands into fists as he stomped off. Messenger boy! Right-hand man equaled messenger boy?! Heh, he'd give him a message alright!

"EVERYONE TO THE THRONE ROOM, IMMEDIATELY!!!" He screamed for the entire castle to hear.

All doors whipped open and without a second of hesitation, the members of the Org poured out. Half didn't know where to go, and thus crashed into each other. Most simply followed where the others were going and eventually, like a giant pack of lemmings, they created a stampede down the hall.

With a bit of savage pleasure he witnessed the rivalry and competitive spirit within a few of the members. Xigbar was taking down all in front of him with his arrowguns. Lexaeus grabbed the coats of others and chucked them behind him roughly, climbing over Xigbar's bodies as he went. What made it even stranger is that he would mumble "Sorry," or "Forgive me for this," before he did it!

As everyone poured into the throne room, it was somewhat as if a game of musical chairs were being played, despite the fact that there were enough seats for everyone. People pushed and snapped at each other for spots and Saix even had to break up the cat fight between Larxene and Xion as they tumbled through the air on their descent down from a seat. Zexion happily took it. Luxord watched on with rapture, not making a single move to stop it.

Even the young blonde guy caught his fair share of hell.

"Move it, dipshit!" Marluxia said coldly.

"It's Demyx," the man said, narrowing his eyes.

"Whatever, dickless." Without warning, he reached out, grabbed Demyx's coat and threw him from the chair. He happened to catch himself just in time and teleported to another seat before he hit the floor.

Saix himself had been the last one to enter the room, so as the chaos finally died down, he simply jumped up to the final remaining spot.

"Welcome, my friends," Xemnas said, addressing the room. His voiced boomed and he actually sounded like he was in charge for once. "Today begins the journey to a new beginning. From this point onward, you are official Organization XIII members. Even…if there really are 15 of us," he added under his breath.

"Now, let the numbering ceremony commence! When I call your name and number, do sit accordingly as I have you arranged."

Saix sat up straighter, knowing his was going to be the first. He was the leader's main-man, after all.

"Number II, Xigbar," Xemnas said.

What the hell?!

"Um, Xemmy?" Saix said, using the nickname to hopefully get him in his good graces. "I believe you made a mistake. You said I was like your biggest helper! How come Xigbar's number two and not me?" Ugh, he was whining. But this was totally unfair!

"Tch, those arrowguns were badass!" Xemnas gushed. Xigbar grinned and gave a little bow. "Though using them on his own team mates is wrong, he shows high initiative in doing whatever it takes to be at the top of the line."

"I hung back to moderate the situation!" Saix blurted out.

"I know. This is why someone like you shouldn't be number two. You're too important to be in the frontlines of battle."

The blue-haired man didn't know whether to continue arguing with him or to simply jump from his seat and strangle him.

Xigbar was moved from his seat near the base of the circle and given a spot directly next to Xemnas on his right. Right-hand man. Wasn't this a bitch.

"Number III, Xaldin." The man was moved to his direct left.

"Number IV, Vexen." Vexen was moved to Xigbar's right.

"Lexaeus, number V." He was seated on Xaldin's left.

By this time, Saix was more than pissed. He wasn't even in the top five?! That was plenty far enough to not be considered "the front lines" or whatever Xemnas liked to think of it as! Angrily, he crossed his arms and drummed his fingers against himself.

"Zexion, number VI." Continuing with the pattern, he sat next to Vexen.

"Saix, number VII."

"Number seven?!" He couldn't hold it back anymore. That was nearly halfway up the ranks!

"Seven's a lucky number," Xemnas said. "And I'm lucky to have such a friend like you!"

Ew…sure to follow a speech like that was more things like 'Saixy' or 'Saix-papi'. Glumly he slid out his seat and floated across the room to sit beside Lexaeus.

"Number VIII, Axel."

"Alright, numero ocho," The man grinned. He sat next to Zexion.

"Number IX, Demyx."

The blonde wasted no time in flicking both his middle fingers at Marluxia before moving to sit beside Saix.

"Number X, Luxord." In a regal fashion, he floated across the room to sit next to Axel.

"Number XI, Marluxia."

The pink-haired man was seething that he had been placed so far up on the list. So engrossed was he with this that he barely registered that his new seating location was right next to Demyx. Demyx didn't miss it however, and shook his head in his hands at the issues to come in the near future.

"Number XII, Larxene."

The woman's natural electricity was all but noticeable as she moved to sit next to Luxord. She cast him a scathing glance that he didn't see since he was shuffling a deck of cards. Axel, who was on his other side, caught the tail-end of the pining look she had given him.

"XIII, Roxas."

The grand effect of thirteen being the last number was totally ruined with the knowledge of there being two more afterwards. Roxas hopped in his seat uncomfortably, sitting next to the ever-harsh Marluxia.

"XIV, Xion."

Her spot was just as bad as Roxas'. With a heavy sigh, she sat down next to Larxene, who was putting all her non-existent heart into ignoring her.

"And last, but never least, member XV, Riku."

As indifferent as always, he walked to the last spot between Xion and Roxas and sat down.

Xemnas looked them over appreciatively. Then his leader-like demeanor broke. "AWWWW!!! Lookie at my Orgie! So adowable in your black coats!! Like little dolls! Yes you are! Yes you are!"

Everyone face-palmed and Xigbar began knocking the back of his head against his chair. Looked like being the boss of a mysterious group still wasn't enough to break him of his flamboyancy. They were stuck with him like that.

And Xemnas wasted no time in elaborating upon this. "Well then. Now that we're all ready, there's a crucial bit of information that you must know. Starting tomorrow, on Monday, I declare every Monday evening afterwards Brotherly Bonding Monday! Each of us must share a bit of information about how we feel about something, be it personal or business. Okay?"

More groans, more face-palms.

All of it totally went over Xemnas' head. "Ooohh, this is going to be great!"

After some more random chatter, they were released. In a 360 move from how they entered, everyone slumped out of the room, dreading what this Organization held in store for them.

As Saix reached his room, he saw that he still had yet to have unpacked. Screw it. He was too emotionally drained. He feng shui'ed some things off his bed and then collapsed on it, falling asleep before his head hit the pillow.

* * *

On a weird whim, I actually did take the time to figure out just what was the seating order of the Org members. Yes, numerous play-backs of the first cutscene in 358/2 Days! xD!

Basically, starting at the head of the circle and going to Xemnas' left would be Xaldin, Lexaeus, Saix, Demyx, Marluxia, Roxas, Riku, Xion, Larxene, Luxord, Axel, Zexion, Vexen, and Xigbar. Naturally, you would really exclude Riku (and maybe even Xion), but you get the idea, ^_^

Anywho, silly ramblings here. Please review!


	5. Unorganized Organization

Another wacky chapter for you guys! Hope you like it!

* * *

**The Ever-Unorganized Organization**

Saix was dozing quite peacefully, thinking that the beds in the old castle weren't half bad…until a loud crash, some cursing and a shrieking siren fully woke him up.

_Oh, come on guys, not already! _He looked over to his alarm clock. Only six-thirty. Someone was about to have hell to pay.

Ripping the blankets back, he marched down the halls, following the sounds of the crashing and cussing, also ripping out every fire alarm along the way. The trail ended up leading to the main kitchen on the third floor. There, Xigbar stood with a frying pan in his hands as he used it to whack at a flaming stove.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Saix yelled at him. "Don't you know banging that thing isn't going to solve anything?"

The man managed a laugh. "As if! I don't see anything else around here to help put this thing out."

Just then, Saix was pushed aside by someone. Demyx.

"I've got this!" He shouted. He held up his hands and said, "Dance, water, dance!"

Immediately, a shower fell upon everyone and everything. At least the fire was out.

"Whoops…sorry, guess I over-killed it," The blonde said, scratching his head guiltily. Then he brightened up. "Well, looks like I did my good deed for the day! Time to catch some more Z's!" And with that, he strutted from the room.

_I would be doing the same thing if _someone _knew how to cook! _Saix fumed. He looked over at Xigbar, who offered a large smile and his own sheepish shrug.

At that moment, Zexion quietly strolled in, his nose in a thick volume of some sort. He seemed to not notice he was walking in water as he went over to the kitchen table and sat down in a seat, until he said, "So, first day breakfast disaster, huh?"

"Tch, as if!" Xigbar answered. "Just a few issues, that's all. We've got this under control, right Saix?"

_Is he always so nonchalant? And gods, I think he has a catchphrase like Axel does! _"Uh, yeah…everything's fine now," Saix mumbled, looking around at the drenched room.

"Hm," Zexion said, never taking his eyes from the book as he flipped a page.

Slowly, the other members of the Org drifted in to examine the wreckage. "Wow, looks like Lady Luck really wasn't on someone's side today," Luxord said.

"Yes, it would appear that the 87% chance of something going wrong today has now been upped to 88%," Vexen noted. "Hold on, let me check this." This time, he pulled out a huge, ancient calculator and got to work, muttering to himself the whole time.

The others did attempt to make breakfast, but this was a household of mainly men…brutish men at that. Lexaeus half smashed the stove with his strength, then kept apologizing profusely for everything he did wrong, looking on the verge of tears. Xaldin tried, but he liked to utilize his powers a bit much. As a wind element, he would rely on that to fetch things from across the room, but such a skill simply wasn't meant for the kitchen. After the eggs ended up splattered on the wall, he bowed and graciously stepped away from the stove.

Marluxia sat back and scoffed at everyone and when asked to give it a try, he snapped, "What, you think I'm a chick?! Is that why?!!" Everyone backed away from him and just left him alone. He went right back to criticizing the others.

Xigbar playfully asked Larxene if she could do it. She gave him an evil smile, flashing her knives. "Sure, I'll make breakfast. I'll make the best breakfast you've ever tasted! Ha…ha ha…mwhahahaha!!" Xigbar glanced out the corner of his eye and saw everyone else quickly shaking their heads and drawing their hands across their throats in the sign of "No, don't do it! You'll regret it!"

"Um, that's okay Larxene, we'll be alright," Xigbar backpedaled.

Even Xemnas tried to help. He gaily flitted around, throwing this and that into a bowl, mixing it up and then putting it in a metal pan to bake. What came out of the oven was something even a roach wouldn't eat.

"Okay people, step aside! Let Axel show you how it's done!" The man said, cracking his fingers as though gearing up for something big. "I actually at one point use to be a stir fry chef."

For a moment, everyone thought of asking just what Asian restaurant would really hire him, but kept their mouths shut.

The man put on an apron that said "Kiss the chef" on it. Larxene tried to come closer to him, but he artfully whipped out a large meat fork and a wagged a finger at her. "Please, hold all appraisals until I'm finished."

So, everyone sat down at the table to watch him. By now, the children had wandered in as well, Roxas and Xion bright-eyed with curiosity and Riku…Riku looked like he couldn't give too much of a damn.

"Look and be amazed, folks!" Axel said to them. He turned to the stove and was about to snap his fingers when something occurred to Saix.

"Axel, no! That's a gas stove!!!" He screamed.

Too late.

Axel snapped and next thing they knew, the kitchen exploded like a fireball. The force of it knocked everyone out of the room and flung them down various halls. Many windows burst and as the flames traveled, the walls took on a deep ash grey. Well, at least it was a bit better than the pristine white.

Saix opened his eyes to find himself all the way in what was to become the Org's common room. Once white as well, it now was grey (thus it became known as the Grey Room). He looked over and saw Axel.

"Uh-oh!" he said, got up and disappeared on the spot in a portal of darkness.

Saix groaned and managed to pull himself to his feet. Shaking his head, he remembered that the kitchen was still on fire and ran back to the room, over three halls away!

There wasn't really much of anything left. Cindering pieces of the ceiling fell down and everything had a look of…Armageddon about it.

"I've got it!!" A voice screamed. Demyx. Again.

"Dem, no, you'll over do it!" Saix shouted but the man wasn't listening.

After another cry of "Dance, water, dance!" everyone who had wandered back to the kitchen was thoroughly soaked.

Except Zexion, who had managed not only to not be soaked, but burnt either. In fact, he looked quite impeccable. The book he'd been reading was fine as well and he silently licked a finger while turning another page.

"I see that I'm going to have to take this upon myself to fix," he said. With a very sorrowful sigh, he looked up from his beloved book. He began to whisper incantations under his breath and right before their eyes, the room slowly restored itself. The ash disappeared to be replaced by a shining veneer to the place. The table and chairs were remade and looked brand new and the unfortunate stove became whole again. He even made a wonderful breakfast, much to everyone's delight.

"Wow…excellent work," Saix congratulated him. He walked into the kitchen and picked up a plate. It shattered in his hand.

"Um…what the hell?" He turned back to the boy.

"What?" he asked. "I'm an illusionist, not a repair man. You want the real thing, then call the real thing," he shrugged. With that, he walked away, returning back to his book.

Saix slumped down against a wall. The others dispersed, but Xemnas hung behind for a bit. The blue-haired man barely registered when he sat a phone book and cell phone in front of him. With what was supposed to be a reassuring pat on the shoulder, he also left.

This was the worst day of his life.

So far.

* * *

The part about the Grey Room is a real place in one of the KH games, but for here, it was more of a pun, ^_^ Just thought I'd clear that up. Alright, please review!


	6. Secret's Out!

Sorry for the long update folks. As I said in another story that I updated, my attention has sadly been diverted to an online avatar site (many of you probably already know what it is) in which I've been expressing my pent-up anime side by cosplaying! Yes, I have warped myself into Axel, Roxas, two versions of Sora and just recently…Xigbar! Oh yeah, I make Xiggy look good *wink* ^_^

Er, anyways…the ideas for this chapter were there, but I think things might've fallen a bit flat. If so, gomen nasai. Still, I hope you find something about it amusing! Read it, like it and please review it!

* * *

**Secret's Out!**

Xemnas told Saix not to worry about the cost of the repair bill for the castle, but it was a bit hard not to ask the man that had done the work as he looked over everything that had just been fixed.

"So…what's the total?" Would they be able to pay it? On what salary?

"Eh, for extensive work like this, 15,000 munny," the man said to him.

"Good Kingdom Hearts, that's high!" Saix yelled, nearly fainting.

The guy shrugged. "I'll send the official bill in the mail." Then he packed up his tools and left.

Just then, Xemnas himself appeared, coming out of a black portal in the wall. "Man it's nice to be able to travel like this!" He said as a way of greeting. "So quick and…Saix-papi, what's wrong?"

The blue-haired man looked like he was in a daze. "That bill…is over 15,000 munny. Xemmy…we don't have that."

Suddenly Xemnas smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. "Relax! I have it all taken care of! Oh, I asked if he'd paint the kitchen a sea green sort of color, did he do it?" He walked a bit down the hall until he was inside the kitchen doorway, then gave a loud squeal. "Oooohhhhh, he did!!!" He ran back to Saix. "Well, the price is all worth it for a kitchen like that, I say!"

"Xemnas, did you listen to a word I said?" Saix demanded, straightening up. "We don't have that kind of money! No one here is working for a paycheck! Which really makes me wonder how the hell we're going to keep this little project of yours afloat!"

This time Xemnas shrugged. "Heartless."

"Heartless?"

"Yeah. They give you munny when you defeat them."

"Come on, man, I'm too damn old to believe some childish line like that."

"Seriously! They do! Usually it's the wallet of the person they once were."

"That's not giving!! That's stealing!"

"Nooo…they're not going to need it where they're going! So…it's basically like they're giving it to you."

Just then, another portal in the wall opened and Marluxia stepped out, his scythe over his shoulder. In his hands was a huge wad of cash and as he walked, he counted what he had. Saix caught snatches of numbers in their thousands as he passed by them.

Huh. So they really would be alright.

Xemnas gave him an 'I told you so' smile before walking off.

The other members of the Org had been given their first tasks. Half of them were assigned to defeating heartless and the others were doing recon in worlds that Xemnas had deemed 'suspicious'. Nine out of ten times, they weren't and the man was just being paranoid, but whatever. Strangely, the others didn't seem to mind so much.

But now that he'd given out the orders, he himself felt…useless! He went out onto the fourth floor terrace and looked up at the hollow form of what was supposedly Kingdom Hearts. It was going to be a long way going in order to complete it.

Out of sheer boredom, he set up a chair there and sat and looked at it. Suddenly, he could hear whispers around him. Not multiple voices, but the sound of a person's voice from a long distance. He looked around until he finally spotted who it was: But of course, Xemnas.

The man had his arms raised to the moon and…was talking to it! "Don't worry Kingdom Hearts. We'll feed you nice and good. Daddy's gonna take real good care of you. With Mommy Saix beside me"—_Mommy Saix?!! _The blue-haired man thought—"And with a castle full of people, you'll never be lonely! Oh, I wanna tell you my first secret. I have Saix' birthday already planned out, gift and all!

KH: …

Then: "I know! Six months away and already I have it figured out! Well, I wasn't Ansem's number one assistant for nothing."

KH: …

"What?! No way Zexion was it! It was me!"

KH: …

"Axel?! Oh, now I know you're lying!"

KH: …

"What the hell do you mean I was too nosey for my own good? You're not a scientist if you're not nosey!"

KH: …

"That's why I'm a Nobody?! Alright, that's it! You're askin' for it buddy!

KH: …

*gasp* "You're not my friend anymore, Kingdom Hearts! I disown you as my child as well! I hate you! We could've been together but you ruined it!" After this, he ran away from the edge of the balcony and back inside. Saix sighed and went in as well. He happened to run into the leader just before he ran in his room.

"Xemnas…please tell me you weren't really holding a conversation with an incomplete moon. Wait, no. Screw the fact that it's incomplete. It's inanimate!

Xemnas sniffled. "And? I felt I could trust it! I knew it and it knew me!"

Saix walked up to him and slapped him hard across the face. "It's a MOON, moron! It cannot be your best friend, lover AND child! And that's just disturbing!"

"See?! Not even you understand me!" Xemnas wailed, and slammed the door to his room shut.

_You've gotta be effing kidding me, _Saix thought. He looked at his watch and realized that today's 'brotherly meeting' was going to be held in roughly an hour. Or…maybe if they were lucky, Xemnas would forget all about it drop the damn idea.

He walked back downstairs to the Grey Room. It was now half full, with the return of Vexen, Larxene, Lexaeus and Luxord. Just as he was entering, he saw the children that had been paired together for their mission come through another portal. The girl was making this annoying, high-pitched sound come out her mouth, like what hyena's do. What was it called again? Oh yeah, laughing. It grated on his nerves.

Just then, the other boy came through the darkness. And although he came through just the same as everyone else, if not quieter, his appearance screamed for attention.

Wrapped around his head was a black headband with a white checkmark on it. In his hands he held a blue bottle of Powerade. He wore a black jersey of some sort with a large checkmark on it too. Same for his shoes and wristbands.

"Riku…may I ask what happened to your Organization apparel?" Saix said, letting the disdain at this new choice of wardrobe show.

Riku shrugged. "Ditched it."

"What?! Why?"

"It was hindering my cash flow," the boy replied, taking off the headband.

"Cash flow?"

"Nike is paying me just to dress up in their stuff. When corporations like them say to do something, you don't say no."

"But…but…you can't turn your back on the Organization!" Wow, he sounded too damn devoted to the cause!

Riku shrugged again. "Do you really think we hold more power than them? They already claimed every basketball player out there. And even golf. Look at Tiger Woods. It's only a matter of time before they have us too."

A horrible vision suddenly came to Saix. He was trussed up in basically the same thing Riku was wearing. In his vision, he was running head-on into a crowd of heartless. The camera focuses on his claymore as he drags it on the ground, creating sparks. Then he lifts it and takes a mighty swing out of a heartless. More jump into the fray but he miraculously hits them all. Then he's doing all sorts of cool flips and the camera, although focusing on him, is still not missing the checkmarks all over his clothing. The last scene is him jumping into the crowd of remaining heartless. The main focus is on his still perfectly clean Nike shoes before everything goes dark and the text "Just do it" dramatically appears.

Dear gods, they were all going to become slaves to Nike! And Riku was the first one!!

He snapped out of his vision, but Riku was gone. Oh well…maybe it really wasn't all so bad. He'd be getting paid a heck of a lot more decent salary than what he was here.

Just then, the loudspeakers came on and a girl's voice could be heard. "Everyone, please report to the fourth floor throne room immediately. The first meeting of the Brotherly Bonding Monday's is about to begin." Then very quietly, they could hear, "Was that good?"

In the background, Xemnas' voice said, 'That was perfect Namine. Thank you."

The PA hung up, and everyone groaned out loud.

Like depressed lemmings, everyone slugged their way up the steps to the appropriate room. Maybe this first meeting would be unsuccessful and Xemnas would give up the idea.

_Right, and maybe Kingdom Hearts really _will _become his love child. _It was the man's differences that had caused him and Saix to become roommates in the first place, but maybe this was a bit too far. Nothing really seemed to be making a lot of sense, but Saix still found himself following along with orders. Xemnas always had such a drive to achieve his ideas. They were usually spontaneous whims, but he'd always gone at them with fervor. 99.9% of them usually failed (and _still _didn't pay a single damn bill!!) and yet it was Xemnas' ambition that had made him see his old lab partner a bit differently.

So in the end, _was _any of this worth the risk? Xemnas would spit some cock and bull about 'As long as there was at least one percent, there was still a chance,' but Saix was a realist and his tingling Saix-senses were telling him this whole thing stood as much of a chance of succeeding as Lexaeus stood a chance of ever scoring with a woman.

He gave another of what was quickly becoming his trademark sigh. For better or for worse, he was now stuck in this. It was too late for regrets.

* * *

Yeah, I know this chapter probably made little to no sense, but forgive me. And yeah, I decided to throw Namine in this. Whether or not she's going to be a captive being held their against her will, I've not decided, and I've also not figured out if this is going to play any part of being centered around the game. More than likely not, since c'mon, Riku is actually in the Org, but I'm keeping my options open, ^_^ Alright, enough rambling. Please be kind and review!


	7. Tell Tale Heartless

Dear gods, this chapter came out long! I had a lot of ideas I wanted crammed in here for the meeting to finally elaborate on the personalities of the other members of the Org. Also, with that said, I will again say that there is some major OOC with the characters. All in the name of comedy folks! Anywho, hope you enjoy it!

* * *

**Tell-Tale Heartless**

When entering the room, one would soon notice that a sixteenth throne had been erected at the base of the circle. In it sat a young girl in a white dress. She appeared nervous to be up so high.

Xemnas was the only other person in the room when Saix entered and he was happy to not have to hear the confusion from the previous day. He warped to his spot to wait for the rest of the members to enter, occasionally throwing a curious glace at the new girl. She gave him a shy smile, then lowered her head and stared at her hands.

The next to enter was Luxord…who could be heard singing down the hall _long _before he even reached the room! "99 bottles of beer on the wall _hic_, 99 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, 98 _hic _bottles of beer on the wall!" He staggered into the room, held up by Xigbar. "Hey, Xiggy!" He slurred. "I betcha _hic, _I betcha you are a pirate!"

"Second day here and he's wasted already," Xigbar muttered, dragging him over to his seat. "He either has a low tolerance or skipped his mission to hit up a bar." He warped him to his chair, leaning him against the armrest so he wouldn't fall out before moving to his own. Xemnas raised a questionable eyebrow at the blonde, who was still muttering the lyrics to his song under his breath.

Xaldin appeared next, sitting stoically in his throne and not saying a word to anyone else. Basically as bad as Riku.

Lexaeus warped into his chair, a pair of long knitting needles in his hand and a wad of yarn in his lap. Any talking that had been in the room a moment ago (Luxord even sobered up) stopped as they watched his hands deftly move about the material. Lexaeus paused and looked up. "What? Am I not allowed to crochet?"

Saix knew little about the art of crochet, but he did notice that the needles the man used were a bit thicker than normal ones. Probably so as to keep him from breaking them with his brute strength. It would appear that Lexaeus was the classic big friendly giant. Great, just what this Organization needed—softies.

Vexen entered next, his hair sticking up all over the place, and Zexion trailing him. He was dictating something and the boy was writing it down on a clipboard. "Let it be known, Zexion, that the hydrochlorus poisonous alcaberus is a major failure and that we will be canceling all further experiments with it until further notice." With an indignant huff, the blonde poofed into his seat. Zexion clicked his pen to close it, shoved the clipboard in a hidden pocket inside the coat and warped to his seat as well.

A loud crash was heard out in the hall, and then a combination of a yelp of pain and multiple giggles. "I meant to do that," someone could be heard saying, causing more laughter to erupt. A second bump was heard against the doorway to the room, before in floated Axel.

Yes, Axel was floating on his own. Drifting for a tiny bit was common with the Nobodies, but Axel had been airborne too long.

Behind him came Roxas and then Xion. All three were floating. Axel paused for a moment to turn around to the two, then squinted at Roxas. "Oh, wow buddy. You still have a little powder under your nose. Here, let me get that for you."

Before the redhead could move, Saix leaned forward and spoke. "What the hell?! Powder?! You brought drugs into this organization?"

Xion cackled again, doing a mid-air backflip. "Listen to how whiney he sounds! Sure, _mother, _I'll go clean my room!" She held her stomach as she continued to spin. "Wow, Roxas, you really do have a lot under your nose still. Don't worry, I'll clean it off—"

Roxas swatted both Axel and Xion away, rising above them. "No! Ever thought that maybe I'm saving it till later? It's mine! You can't have it! You had your share!"

By now, Saix' eyes were so wide, it was a wonder that they hadn't popped out his head already. _This has got to be some sort of sick joke…they're just casually talking about doing drugs right in front of the Superior like it's nothing! _

Finally, Xemnas spoke up. "Just what is the meaning of this? Share of what? And where did it come from?"

Roxas threw a haughty glare at his companions before answering. "Something I got in Neverland. A pixie gave it to me. When she sprinkled it on us, it allowed Xion and I to fly. Well, I still had some left after the mission, so I shared some with Axel. Axel, being the idiot he is—"

Axel giggled, then farted a fire ball. "Whoops," he chuckled, fanning his behind.

"—thought that you were supposed to snort it," Roxas continued, frowning at the man's lack of manners. "So it's kind of having some adverse effects on him at the moment. As for Xion…I think she's just naturally silly."

"That still doesn't explain how it got under your nose," Saix put in. Roxas gave him a glare that told the man that this conversation had been between he and Xemnas and that his input wasn't welcomed. But he didn't say this.

"It just so happened that some of the fairy dust settled under my nose. I had my head tilted back when she sprinkled me with it." Finally, he brought up a hand and wiped the remainder of the powder away, brushing it on his pants. He sat down in his throne, trying to put the matter behind him, until he felt a hand touch him.

Axel had floated up and grabbed his leg, bringing his face closer to the area where the dust had been smeared. Just when his nose was about to touch the cloth, Roxas whipped out his keyblade and lowered it right into his face. "If you don't get the hell away from me, I won't hesitate to smite you."

Axel looked hurt, but next to him in her chair, Xion began laughing that high-pitched laugh of hers again. "What time line are you from, Roxas? 'Smite'! Rolling In Air, Laughing My Ass Off!!!"

Yes, a created phrase and she was actually text talking. It didn't get much more disturbing than this.

Regardless, Axel finally moved to his spot, and seemed subdued when he was away from his friends.

Marluxia and Larxene entered together, chatting like they were old friends. In all actuality, they were, and were quite pleased that this Org gave them a chance to reconnect again. They parted ways once they reached the chairs and each warped to their appropriate spots.

Riku entered next. His attire had finally been switched back to the standard outfit, but he did keep the Nike shoes on. Around his eyes was also a blindfold. As he walked, he crashed into several objects, broke a vase, warped and sat on Xaldin, Vexen, and Luxord before eventually finding his seat and sitting down.

The very last to enter was Demyx, who came rushing in with slightly disheveled hair. "Ohh man, I totally over-slept! Why didn't I set an alarm clock?!" In mid run, he vanished, then appeared again in his place between Marluxia and Saix. He flashed an apologetic smile to the room, trying his hardest not to fidget.

Xemnas nodded once all the seats were filled. "Well then, not too horribly bad, I suppose, for our first meeting. I would first like to start off by introducing our guest." He gestured to the young blonde who sat between Riku and Xion now. "Meet my brother's cousin's uncle's half-sister in-law's aunt, Namine."

Saix tried to piece together that family line and epically failed.

"She will be staying with us for a bit, so I want all of you to treat her as you would your own family," Xemnas continued.

"Wanna go out drinkin', luv?" Luxord spoke up.

"Er, I'm underage…" Namine said.

"Oh come now, a spot of rum never hurt!"

"I just said treat her like family!" Xemnas shouted. "What are you doing?"

"In my family, we're drunk when we come out the womb!" Luxord laughed. He gave another hiccup, and his head went lax and hit the back of his chair. A loud snore announced that he had promptly fallen asleep.

"Right…" Xemnas said. "Anywho, this meeting is to make us all bond better! So…anyone care to recount the details of their day? A problem that they're having? Some juicy gossip to get off their chest?" He said this last part with way too much eagerness in his voice.

The room was still for a moment, until Vexen spoke up. "As half of us here were scientists before…things changed, it vexes me to see that the lab here is quite inadequate for scientific research."

Xemnas shrugged. "That was the old life, Vex. We're trying to move on with the new one."

"Hear, hear!" Xigbar cheered.

"But…science is my LIFE!" Vexen cried. "And if I hope to get the Nobel prize before I'm fifty—"

Nearly everyone suddenly fell over laughing.

"Damn Vexen, how old are you now?!" Marluxia sneered.

"None of your beeswax!" The man sniffed.

This only caused the pink-haired man to laugh more. "You might want to do some carbon dating on yourself! I betcha you'll start to remember that you actually once walked with the dinosaurs! Hell, you might even be the missing link!"

"I'm not that old!!!" Vexen screamed at him.

Xemnas was trying his hardest to be a proper leader, and thus held back his own giggles. "That's enough you two. And Vexen, if you would like a research lab, there's a room in the basement I will allow you to use. I'll fund you the basics for it but the rest is up to you."

The blonde childishly stuck his tongue out at Marluxia.

"Any other news or questions?" Xemnas asked. When no one said anything, he turned to Lexaeus. "I see you have quite an unusual hobby there. Care to talk about how it came about?"

The man looked somewhat nervous at being put on the spot. "I…was taught by my grandmother," he said. He threw death glares to everyone that snickered before continuing. "At seventy-five, she found out she had cancer and didn't have long left to live…especially considering her age. I was her only grandchild, and since the news came during the summer, I spent my time in her hospital room, keeping her company. She soon taught me how to crochet and said that it made her feel calm and at ease with herself. I actually still have loads of stuff that she made me.

"From the moment that I knew that I could properly crochet, I began to make her something back. It was a pillowcase…it was put beside her in her coffin." He stopped speaking and lowered his head.

Xaldin was the first to speak. "Holy crap, I _feel,_" he muttered. Several others nodded in agreement and Xemnas dabbed at his eyes with a lacey handkerchief.

"Beautiful, Lexaeus, just beautiful!" He gushed. Giving a tiny sniffle, he looked around the room again. "Anyone else?" His eyes happened to land on the blue-haired boy across from him. "Zexion, care to share with the room?"

"No," he said. There was no attitude in it, or anything.

"Nothing? How about how you became a Nobody?"

"Don't remember."

"Er, okay…how was your day today?"

"The sun rose and set."

Xemnas actually wanted to strangle this boy. "Fine…how does the sunrise here make you feel?"

"I don't," he replied.

It was at this point that the boy's total apathy started giving him the willies and he backed off. "Alrightie then…someone else?"

Without having to be prodded, Roxas raised his hand and spoke. "My mission was to scout out this place called Destiny Island. Quite frankly that sounds more like a tourist attraction, but whatever. Anyways, while there, I met this kid with huge brown hair. He kept jabbing me with a stick and seemed to think it was funny. So I finally pulled out my keyblade on him and he started yelling at me like my actions were uncalled for."

Riku had been sitting quietly with his arms folded and head down, but at this, he slowly lifted it up. "I'm guessing you dislike this boy?" he asked.

"Tch, I _hate _that kid!" Roxas shouted. "His name was Sora…a total chick's name. I can't stand his annoying little girlfriend either. She's the reason I found out his name, because she couldn't go three seconds without calling him! 'Sora, Sora, Sora!'" he mimicked. "But what really burned me up is that _he's a keyblade wielder too!!_ Just totally threw the fact that I had this seemingly unique weapon back in my face by showing me he had the exact same thing! That's alright, I'll make my own cool weapon. In fact, I'll make two of them! Then we'll see who's showing up who!"

"Just so you know, those are my friends you're talking about," Riku said.

"Like I care! Tell your stupid friend I don't like to be poked and prodded like a beached whale!"

The silver-haired boy quirked an eyebrow at this, but only said, "Fine. Duly noted."

Before a fight could break out, Xemnas clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "Alright! Wasn't today progressive? We'll meet back here at the same time next week. Thank you kindly to those that shared and I hope to hear something from the rest of you!" With that, he vanished in a swirling dark portal.

Zexion looked down at his watch, then muttered in a carrying voice, "I suppose I'll go start dinner, seeing as how sadly a group of full-grown adults cannot cook." He too left out.

A few more of the members took their leave. Xigbar came over to Luxord's seat and supported him as they vanished into the darkness.

Soon all that was left was Saix, Demyx, Larxene and the three children. Namine spoke up. "Um…I hate to ask this, but I really need help getting down. My…uncle put me up here to begin with, but it seems he just forgot me."

"How careless of him," Roxas said with a scoff.

"Oh, I'm actually quite used to it," the girl said brightly. "Uncle Xemnas has always been forgetful when it comes to me. Often times if I didn't remind him that my attic bedroom at his old place locked from the outside and I couldn't get out, I would have starved to death. But he'd always manage to remember just in time," she smiled.

'_Da hell…?! _Saix thought. How could she be so chipper about that?!

Roxas, seemingly like a gentleman, helped her down. Xion was still half giggling in her seat, and as a sudden burst of something randomly funny hit her, she slumped out of her chair and fell to the ground.

Riku shot from his seat in time to catch her and as they safely hit the floor, she giggled, "The stoic prince rescues the princess." He gave a noncommittal grunt before dropping her on the floor and strolling out of the room.

Saix looked over to the two remaining people, Demyx and Larxene. The woman had a hand up to her mouth, like she was about to sneeze.

"You're gonna be okay, eh?" Demyx asked her. At that moment, she finally let loose the sneeze.

The blonde would later say he couldn't quite remember the next few moments, but at least there was Saix to tell the tale. Larxene accidently struck him with lightning along with the sneeze. A bolt came down from the ceiling and hit the man. He fell from his spot, spazzing in midair. When he finally hit the ground, he convulsed and flopped around like a fish. The electricity was a bad combination with his water element.

"Dance! Skip, skip, dance!" he babbled incoherently. The electric current ran its course for a whole five minutes before Demyx finally lay still, panting.

"Wow…that was pretty interesting!" Larxene said. "Maybe I should do that more often."

"Let's not and say that you did," the other blonde whimpered, struggling to his feet and limping away. She hopped down and followed behind him, which made him extremely nervous.

Saix sighed, then considered heading back to his own room. He still had yet to have fully unpacked. But then his stomach growled and he began to wonder what Zexion would be cooking. The bright white of the room was starting to hurt his eyes and at least Xemnas' new kitchen would offer a reprieve. So, without further ado, he went to go be nosey.

* * *

Alright, so that was my ridiculously long chapter, lol! And no, I was not bashing either Kairi or Sora; I don't think I actually dislike any one in KH. Also, although I'll try to not have any pairings in this, I personally do go along with the cliché Roxas/Namine stuff. And…I personally like the idea of Riku/Xion. But, eh, that's just me…

Now I'm off to currently await for my personal Christmas gifts of an akuroku jacket I made on Zazzle and an ice cream maker to arrive! Yes, I actually intend to sport an Akuroku jacket (no pictures, just text) and as for the ice cream maker…I want to finally make sea-salt ice cream! ^_^ Obsessed much? You have no idea… Er, anywho! Please be kind and review!


	8. All The Small Things

Chay for reading around and Wikipedia, people! Now we all know Saix's real name! Isa…never would've thought of that, on account of how girly it seems, lol! Supposedly, it's pronounced more like 'eye-zah' though. Ohh, I've never wanted a PSP so badly in my life!! Axel and Saix-puppy before they were Nobodies has got to be awesome!

Ugh…gotta get over my obsession with those two. Anywho, a new chapter for you guys. Hope you enjoy it! ^_^

* * *

**All The Small Things**

A new home, new people, and now…new food. Saix was _so _psyched (Isn't disgruntled Saix adorable?).

The smells from the kitchen were quite exquisite, that was for sure. He popped his head around the corner and saw the blue-haired boy flipping something in a skillet while at the same time stirring the contents of a pot. It would appear the kid actually had skills.

Just when he was about to pull back, Saix felt someone crush his chest and back. Xemnas was leaning over the man, thus putting pressure on his back. Xigbar was slightly crouched just under him, and together, they sandwiched him in as they too peeked in on the chef.

"Do you two mind?!" Saix snarled at them.

"Not at all!" Xemnas said. "Xigbar, do you mind?"

"Nope," the man grinned.

"Not you two! Me!"

"Well, if you mind, then why don't you, ya know, move?" Xigbar said.

"Because you two are crushing my lungs!"

"Do Nobodies have lungs?" Xemnas mused.

With an agitated yell, Saix began swatting them away. He knocked the other two off balance and as one, they toppled fully into the kitchen.

Zexion regarded them eyes that held only the slightest bit of amusement. "Dropping in?" He said.

"Ha ha, if I had a heart, this would be where I'd die of laughter," Saix muttered, standing up and dusting himself off.

"Now's not the time to use that line, Saix, because I have a feeling you're going to use it often," the boy told them. Turning back to his food he said, "You're actually in time. Have a seat."

Saix was about to, but then he froze. "Zexion, if this is another one of your illusion tricks…"

"You wouldn't know because you'd be under the impression that it's real," he finished for him. "And for the record, illusions don't fill your stomach. Even I have to eat. But if you don't believe me, pinch yourself." He walked over to the fridge and pulled out a bowl of salad and set it on the table.

Saix looked at his arm for a moment and was about to actually do as the other had said and pinch himself, when Xemnas did it for him. "Ha ha, you're not wearing green!" He chortled, twirling a thin, green band of some sort around a finger. "Pinch, poke, you owe me a Coke!"

"Xemnas. It's not St. Patrick's Day. It's not even March. And to let you know, it's stuff like that that makes me go berserk. Literally."

The Superior only shrugged and sat down. Zexion had now placed the rest of the dishes on the table and he was about to tuck in when the young scientist interrupted him with a yell.

"Aren't you going to wash your hands?!!" He cried out, looking quite horrified. "You've been touching all sorts of foreign surfaces and such and now you're going to simply put those same hands on the food that we all have to eat! As a scientist yourself, I figured you'd know better!"

"Actually, Zexion," Xemnas spoke, "I became a heartless when I defied such a simple rule. I knew it was evil…but I didn't care. I gave in to the darkness and now I'm here. Got a problem with that?"

The boy struggled to find something to say, but came up short. With a heavy sigh, he plopped down in a chair and began eating as well.

The others came in shortly after, sounding like a heard of elephants. It was clear that groups and cliques had been formed. And though it was the smallest, it was no contest that the Marluxia/Larxene pairing was the one to be most feared.

"Oh look, it seems Mr. Baldy has come to sit with us!" Larxene gasped in mock surprise. She leaned over Xion's seat and held up a lock of her short hair.

"I'm not a boy!" The girl said. "And look who's talking, Miss Extreme Les—"

"Let's cut it out and just eat!" Xemnas said, smiling at the pair. The women threw heated looks at one another. Larxene took a seat on a far end of the table.

The chatter and laughter was almost deafening, but it didn't keep the leader from feeling his phone go off in his pocket. He answered it with a chuckle. "Hello?...Namine? Oh wow, where are you? You're missing out on this excellent meal Zexion made! In your room? What are you doing there?! I locked you in? Nonsense! I only shut the door when I returned that book to you…oh. Maybe I did lock it. Well, I'm on my way sweetheart."

He hung up and disappeared for a moment into a portal. Before it could fully close, he was back, guiding the thin girl by an arm.

"There, there now. Have a seat and eat," he said, gesturing to a free spot between Luxord (who was still half drunk) and Lexaeus (who was still crocheting at the table). Without looking at either of the two, she grabbed the nearest pot to her and dumped a wad of the contents on her plate. She immediately fell upon the food like a starving dog, smacking lips and all.

You know it's bad when two strong men such as Lexaeus and Luxord actually scoot a few inches away in fright.

The girl burped, wiped her face on her arm, and then dug into another container. While this was happening, all eyes slowly moved over to Xemnas, narrowed in accusation.

"What?! I didn't teach her that!" He said defensively.

"How could you let it get that bad?" Vexen asked.

Xemnas shrugged. "She gets that from her mothers' side." He thought they were still talking about her eating habits.

The blonde sighed. "Never mind…"

What the others didn't finish, Namine polished off. After everything was gone (even the bones were cleaned and nibbled on), she sat back with a contented huff, rubbing her stomach. "Whoo! That was nice! Kudos to the chef!" She gave a quick toast to Zexion with her cup, downed it in one swallow, belched loudly, then promptly keeled over onto the floor, knocked out.

"Isn't it awesome to have such dinner entertainment?" Demyx said, beaming broadly.

"Yeah, I'd actually kill you to see that again," Marluxia said. At this, Demyx put his plate in the kitchen sink and left.

The others did the same. Since all the dishes had been licked clean by Namine, Zexion simply piled them into the dishwasher and washed them on a light setting.

It was as he was heading to his room that he noticed there was something on everyone's doors. Small plaques had been placed on each one. Every room had two, the name and number of the occupant and then…something else. When he got to his, he stared at it in almost a horrified shock.

In black letters was his name, Zexion. Underneath it though were the words "Cloaked Schemer."

"Alright, who the _hell _came up with this!" He shouted. Next to his room was Xaldin's. The man stared at his door for a moment, then shrugged. "I'm the Whirlwind Lancer," he said, then entered his room without actually opening the door.

On the other side of Zexion was Demyx's room. "Is there some particular reason why I've been called a Melodious Nocturne? I don't even like the night!"

Up and down the halls, each person fussed over all of their names. Saix heatedly looked at his with disgust. "Luna Diviner? Where the hell did Xemnas get that?!"

"Yeah, because there's nothing divine about you," Axel so nicely said to him. Saix's scowl strengthened. "But at least you got something remotely cool," Axel continued. "I'm the Flurry of Dancing Flames. C'mon! Does it get any gayer?! Marluxia is seriously straddling the gender boarder and he got Graceful Assassin! And I'm the flaming gay guy!"

Roxas chose that moment to stride down the hall with a very smug look on his face. In his hands was his title plaque. "Well boys, looks like I came out on top with this one. Read it and weep!" He flashed the plate to the others, who all in turn read it, and then began to glare at him.

"Oh yeah, the Key of Destiny!" Roxas beamed. "Hey, don't hate; I'm just cool like that," he said, continuing his conceited saunter.

Dimly, the others heard Xion scream, "I didn't even get one!!" but they ignored her.

Riku stared dismally at his. It simply read 'land'. "My name in Japanese. How creative," he muttered. "I wonder what Xemnas chose for himself?"

At this, everyone walked down the hall to the last room at the end. His door read "Number one" at the top in beautiful gold lettering. Under it was "Superior of the In-Between."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Larxene asked.

"Don't think I want to know," Vexen shuddered. "Well, I'm supposedly the Chilly Academic. Do you guys think that's fitting?"

"Nope," Demyx said. "You deserve the basic term of 'Creepy Scientist Dude.'"

Vexen sniffed and said, "Nobody asked _you, _Nine."

"Well, I gave my input anyways," Demyx shot back.

"We could've done without it," Vexen argued.

"Well that's just too damn bad!" The boy shouted.

"How about both of you little ass farts shut the hell up?" Marluxia said.

"Now listen here, Eleven," Vexen began, but suddenly was cut off.

"Hey, I'm the Freeshooter!" Xigbar randomly burst out. "And number Two of this joint. And I say get your butts in bed before I use 'em as target practice!"

Now everyone was glaring at _him._

"Okay, hear me now, believe me later," Xigbar shrugged. Without warning, he casually cocked one of his guns, then aimed it at Zexion and shot him in the chest. The boy went down like a rock.

"OUCH! What the hell is wrong with you?! I didn't do anything!"

"Exactly!" Xigbar grinned. "Should've moved your ass!" He cocked the gun again, and everyone ran away, screaming at the top of their lungs. Zexion opened a portal and crawled through it, moaning in pain as he went.

"Alright! A hunt!" Xigbar said. Vanishing on the spot, he appeared again farther down the hall and directly in front of Demyx, but on the ceiling. "You look like you'd be fun to mess with," he admitted. "There's just something about you…"

"Why me?!" Demyx squeaked. "Your—you're not going to torture me, are you?"

"As if! Don't worry. I won't hurt you…too badly." He began to lower the gun.

Without thinking, Demyx reached up and yanked his hair, pulling him to the floor. Before the man could chase after him, he opened his own portal and vanished inside.

By now, the corridor was empty, the last door being slammed shut. "Damn. Guess I'll just have to get 'em another time," he lamented. He grinned at the prospect as he headed to his own room.

* * *

Okay, admittedly, I'm not fully, fully certain of where this story is going. I know that I had wanted to incorporate a few ideas into it, and I have a vague idea of what the over-all plot is (besides just the insane randomness). With all of that said, please forgive me if the chapters seem kinda…filler-ish. I'll be the first to tell you I'm not great with just getting down to the gist of things!

Anywho...oh, and Happy New Years! ^_^


	9. IDK, My BFF Saix

Happy 1/7/10!! Know what that means? Today is Xemmy and Saix-puppy's day, lol! Yeah…I'm a supporter of basically all of the couplings. Eek. And the 10 part was mentioned because it is currently the year of the Luxord. Funny, I and a friend had to laugh about two things related to the years. One, he and I both become legal drinkers this year (not that we care to really drink, but it's just the thought). And two, 2012 is supposedly the end of the world (No, I do NOT believe that. Again, it's just a funny thought). I told him that Larxene is the reason the world ends.

In case you're wondering just where the heck all of this is coming from, I recently found a comic by Ladychimera celebrating 2008 with Axel being overjoyed that it was finally 'his year'. If you've not read it, I believe it's just called "Happy New Years" or something. As all her comics, it's brilliantly hilarious. Oh, and Luxord might want to enroll into a detox program.

* * *

**"IDK, My BFF Saix"**

Bright and early the next morning, Xemnas called yet another meeting, but this time in the Grey Room. Everyone shuffled in, rubbing sleep out of their eyes and a few still had on their slippers. Zexion came in, doubled over still and rubbing his sore chest. Against it, he held a medical cold pack.

"Regular ice works better," Lexaeus told him.

"Thank you, _mother,_" The boy snapped irritably.

Xemnas clapped and raised his hands for silence. "This will be quick, since this isn't an official meeting. It has come to my attention that Kingdom Hearts will only take hearts that are released with the keyblade. And since Roxas is the only person with one, I say that he should be the one doing all the slaying. Agreed?"

"Agreed!" Everyone else said.

"Wait, what the hell?!" Roxas shouted. "Just me?! But…Xion has a keyblade too!"

"Don't be a snitch, Roxas!" The girl shouted at him.

"I thought we were friends!!" He yelled back. She only shrugged.

Xemnas looked at Roxas with what as supposed to be pitying eyes. "Now, now, I know how…mean this all seems. But you're now about to become the underdog champion! We're counting on you to get the job done! Don't let us down, kiddo!"

"I…No!" Roxas shouted, throwing his weapon down on the ground. A second later, he realized what was about to happen. "Uh-oh…" The blade came back to him in a flash, the force knocking him off his feet. As he slowly got back up, he asked, "Okay…fine. But just explain to me why Xion doesn't have to do anything. Or, better yet, Sora!"

Xemnas sighed, then flicked his eyes to someone else in the room. It was hard to tell which person it was. "Sora…Well, why use Sora when we have you? As for Xion…her father doesn't want her out there in the line of danger."

Xion blanched. "Dude, my father walked out on me and my mom when I was a kid! What do you know about him?"

Suddenly, Vexen stepped forward. "Because I _am _your father," he said.

"DUN DUN DUN!!!" Demyx said dramatically.

"Was that supposed to be a Star Wars reference? 'Cause I'm not laughing!" Xion yelled, holding her Keyblade in a ready position.

"No…you are my daughter. Sort of," Vexen said. "I actually created you. You are one in a list of replicas I hope to make in order for us to get more hearts."

"No! That's impossible! And sick! And…ewwww….!!! You're old!" Xion looked disgusted.

"Don't you talk to your father like that, young lady!" Vexen snapped.

The girl shook her head. "But…if I was created to collect hearts—and I'm not complaining here but--why _am_ I not fighting? Roxas is going to get torn a new blowhole out there!"

Maybe Saix imagined it, but was that a smirk that flickered across Axel's face?

"Well, sweetie, I just want to protect you," Vexen said, stepping closer with his arms out. "I want to protect my little girl."

Xion took a step back. "I will never accept you as my father! You hear me?"

"I'm not deaf, damnit!" The scientist whined.

"I refuse to ever be your daughter! You may have created me and evidently altered my memories so I don't remember it, but I don't have to just take this!" She turned and ran away from him, disappearing in her own portal.

"You're grounded, missy!" Vexen called after her as the hole vanished. "Good Kindom Hearts…she's going to be one of those rebellious ones," he muttered. "Next thing you know, she'll come back with a nose piercing, tattoos and boys hanging off her arms! I'll have 'The Talk' with her when she returns."

Roxas shook his head. "This is still totally unfair!" He said.

"You can also bitch about fair and unfair later," Saix muttered. He opened a pocket book and said, "Let's see here…ah! Hollow Bastion. There's a huge heartless problem there. Go deal with that, then head to Halloween Town. It seems Oogie Boogie has kind of gone off his rocker and maybe you can knock some sense into him. And last, but of course not least…you should enter a tournament at the Coliseum. Oh, and um…watch out for Cerberus."

He snapped his book shut and opened a portal against the wall. Shoulders at an all-time lowest sag, Roxas went through it and disappeared.

"Soo…what happens to the rest of us now?" Luxord asked.

"Why, we sit back and relax, luv," Larxene purred. Yes, purred.

"She's actually right," Xemnas said. "I have to rethink our strategy now. I believe all our hard work calls for a day off. Now, let's see…Roxas mentioned something about a Destiny Island a few days ago…"

"No!" Riku shouted. "That's my home! We are _not _going there!"

"Too late!" Xemnas said, and walked into his own portal. The rest of the Organization followed him, Riku bringing up the end with his protests.

"Ahh, the sea, the sand and the sun!" their leader breathed taking in the sights.

"I hate sand," Xaldin muttered, and headed to higher grounds away from the beach.

Half of the others had already stripped down to their skivvies and was wading in the water. Well, all except Axel.

"Aww, don't like the sea?" Demyx asked.

"I'm a fire element. Water is like my kryptonite."

Suddenly, the blonde smirked. "Oh? Is that so…"

"Dem…what are you—DON'T DO THAT!!!!"

Controlling the water, Demyx made a huge wave come onto the land. As it pulled back out to the sea, it washed away Zexion's sand castle, and took Axel with it.

It was then that everyone learned that Axel also couldn't swim. "Whoops…" The blonde said. "Well, I think that's my cue to get going!" With that, he vanished somewhere else.

Lexaeus was closest to Axel in the water, and effortlessly scooped him up and dragged him back to shore. With little grace, he let him flop onto the sand, his face blue with the lack of oxygen.

"I actually don't know CPR," he told the gathering crowd.

Everyone else looked around at each other too. Finally, Marluxia stepped forward. "I'll save the idiot," he sneered, pushing the others aside.

A horrified cringe rippled through everyone.

With little time to waste, he dropped to his knees and began giving Axel air through the mouth. The cringing intensified and most couldn't look at all.

With a gasping cough, Axel woke up, spitting out water as he came to. "Wow…you guys saved me," he said weakly.

"Tch, as if!" Xigbar said. "The big lug over there pulled you out of the water and this…flower child gave you the kiss of life."

"Flower child?" Axel asked. His eyes roamed over the Organization…and came to a horrified pause on Marluxia. The pink-haired man gave him a cruel grin.

"No…NO! You should've just let me die!"

"How ungrateful!" Marluxia teased. "Maybe next time, I will." He walked off, Larxene next to him, who lamenting over the fact of not knowing CPR herself.

Xemnas applauded the group effort. "Great work, team! That's what I'm talking about! Brotherly bonding!"

That cringe had now officially turned into an outright shudder.

Saix decided to get away from the action. Across a wooden bridge was a small chunk of land with a fallen tree across the width of it. Since the spot happened to be vacant, he figured it'd make a great place to get the hell away from all the commotion.

_Riku's pretty lucky to live here, _he thought. _Island life all the time…_

"Hi, Saix-papi!" A blur of black and silver said happily as it flopped beside him.

_Ugh. _"Hello, Superior," Saix muttered.

"Wow, have you tried one of these fruits?" Xemnas blabbed. "I mean, wow! Here, have a bite!" He said, holding out a yellow star-shaped fruit.

"No…I'm really not a fruit person," Saix said, pushing it away.

"Aw, come on! There's not a lot on the trees and I've never seen them sold in stores. Here, share one with me so that the locals can still have some."

Saix _really _didn't want to eat the damn thing, but if it'd make the man shut up sooner, it was worth it. He took a piece that was handed him and shoved it in his mouth. "I guess it's okay…" he admitted. But that was a lie. That stuff was delicious! Full of sugary goodness that made even the sweetest melon seem bland. He eagerly accepted another piece that Xemnas held out.

While they ate, a set of footsteps could be heard on the bridge behind them. "Oh, Riku. Wow, your island is beautiful!" Xemnas continued on in that…joyful way of his. "And my, what do you call these fruits? They're quite exquisite!"

_Gay, gay, gay!! _Saix mentally chanted, while still smacking loudly on the fruit.

Riku's eyes widened as he stared between the two. "You…didn't both eat off the same fruit, did you?"

"Uh…yeah. I mean, there's not a lot of them on the trees so I—" Xemnas began.

"Oh man…oh no….It's just legend, Riku, it doesn't mean anything," he muttered to himself.

"Care to explain?" Their superior asked, straightening up and getting serious.

With a huge sigh, Riku said, "Supposedly, if two people share a paopu fruit, their destines become intertwined. They stay with each other forever."

It was here that Saix tuned into the conversation. He slowly looked down at the rest of the fruit in his hands, then spat it out on the ground and flung the rest out to sea. "And you just oh so conveniently forgot to mention this?!" Saix yelled.

"Like I was to know you two would eat one!" Riku shouted. "I hope you guys learn to get along or you have a lifetime of annoying hell to go through…" With that, he walked away, shaking his head.

Xemnas on the other hand, ran up to him and gave him a glomping hug. "Xem-Saix 4ever!" He shouted out gleefully.

"Oh dear gods, kill me now…" the blue haired man whispered as his face was smothered in Xemnas' leather coat.

- - -

Much later in the day, another portal appeared on the beach, and Xion and Roxas stepped through it. Xion looked slightly agitated, but for the most part was herself. Roxas on the other hand…looked as though he had been put in a blender set to 'chop'.

Loudly, for the entire island to hear, he began explaining his story.

"Alright, so being the _good little boy _I am, I head out to Hollow Bastion first. A heartless problem doesn't come close to what I had to deal with there! They need a SWAT team designated to fighting heartless. And whoever built that annoying security system there needs to be shot by Xigbar as well! They had _me _locked up in a cell until they were certain I wasn't a heartless! Absolute bullcrap!

After I'm finally let go, I hit up a library to get a little background info on Halloween Town. But I somehow tripped and landed _inside _of a book! Next thing I know, I'm in the woods somewhere. Then out of nowhere I'm mauled by a tiger! In the woods! Can you believe this?!

So I finally get out of the damn woods somehow, which is really getting out of the book and I go to Halloween Town. I'm trying to ask around about this Oogie Boogie person, but most of the people were too scared to talk about him and the only ones that might've told me something about him were these three annoying ass little kids who kept chucking bombs at my face! I swear, I was _this close _to beating them up and dealing with the repercussions later!

And last but not least, the Coliseum. Joining a tournament, no problem. But I just love how Seven left out that Cerberus was a three headed dog!! Oh, I had _loads _of fun with him! In short, I'm tired, I'm hungry, I'm pissed, and all of you can suck my—"

"Well, happy you had fun out there!" Xemnas interrupted. "But we need to be getting back to the castle. Into the portal, everyone!" He cast open an entrance into the darkness.

As the others RTC'd (returned to castle), Roxas saw something out the corner of his eye and turned. Riku had walked up to another person and was hugging them. Sora. The brown haired boy was facing Roxas, and as Riku leaned down, Sora held up two fingers behind his back. Two middle fingers. Then he switched it to his index fingers, mouthing, "If you ain't first, you're last!"

If Axel hadn't grabbed his arm and forcefully pulled him into the portal, Sora would've been four fingers less than what he started the day out with.

The evening winded down with a much quieter dinner than the night before. Maybe because Xemnas forgot his niece again? Saix had to bring her a plate himself, but even that wasn't enough. He forgot the girl was a human black hole. So, he brought her to the fridge and let her grub to her hearts' content.

There was nothing left.

By the time Namine had finished eating the last corn cob from a few nights ago, it was past one in the morning. She burped him good night and left him to clean up the mess.

Oh joy.

* * *

Excuse the length of this chapter. I had a small plot bunny that had more bunnies and then…this was formed. It's a run-around chapter, but blame the sudden remembrance of today's date. Also, I'm struggling to have the cliché couples in this, or to keep them as single people (with maybe hints of the couples, but nothing definite). You guys can choose, 'kay? Be kind and review now!


	10. School of Nobodies

Recently, I watched the movie Keith, starring Jesse McCartney. You know you're a KH fangirl when you don't even call the voice actors by their real names. Jesse was then to me and forever will be seen as Roxas now! I called him that during the entire thing…his personality was like Roxas and Axel fused! And the blonde girl that was the other main character…eh, she wasn't like Namine, but I called her that, just to make things more complete. Great movie, nice plot. Check it out if you guys haven't seen it.

But first, read this chapter, lol!

**

* * *

School of Nobodies**

After the ranting Roxas did the day before, Xemnas kindly rescinded his plan to make him be the only one to work. There were other jobs to be done, and if he was collecting hearts the entire time, the other tasks couldn't be completed.

This is why Vexen, Riku, Xion and Larxene had been deployed to Atlantica to do a recon mission. None knew much about the location except Vexen, who had made everyone take a weird pill before leaving.

"Trust me, you'll be happy that you did," he had told them. Now that they were there, they knew why. The dry land they were standing on wasn't the real part of the world they were entering. Once they dived into the water, their bodies automatically began rearranging themselves, some limbs shortening, or lengthening, some disappearing altogether.

Riku looked down at himself and noticed he was now in the form of a great white shark. It wasn't his thing to give cheers and shouts of joy, but if it were, he would've. It didn't get anymore awesome than that.

Xion was a sea urchin. And she wasn't happy about it. "I look like a Koosh ball!" she said. "How the hell am I supposed to move around like this?"

It was then that they noticed two things. One, Vexen was a starfish. "I. Am so. Humiliated," he mumbled.

The second was that Larxene was now the next Little Mermaid. She sported a deep purple tail with glittering scales down the middle in varying shades of blue. This particular mermaid seemed to have been given a Wonder bra though, and Larx proudly turned herself this way and that in a showy fashion to show off the attributes she had with and perhaps even without the mermaid appearance.

"Yes, mirror, mirror on the wall, I already know I'm the prettiest of them all," she said, flipping her hair unnecessarily, considering the water made it constantly float anyways.

"We're only here to scout the area, so we might as well get a move on," Vexen said. "I'd really not like to have to stay in this form much longer…" He drifted over to Riku, then landed on his back.

Riku swiveled his body to look at him. "Um…yeah. Dude, you're sticking to me."

"Yes, I'm aware of that," Vexen said in a tired voice. He was _really _not enjoying being a starfish. "My natural movement is to glide only along the bottom of the ocean, and it's not very fast at that. You're the fastest swimmer here."

Xion had to admit that the man had a point. Unfortunately, she couldn't stick to Riku. With absolute reluctance, she looked to Larxene.

"Aww, does the koosh ball need transportation?" Larxene asked with a cruel smile.

Xion would've given anything to have hands at that moment to punch her with. Instead, she was forced to swallow her anger. "Yes. I do need transportation," she gritted out.

Larxene swam a circle around her, looking at her this way and that. "If you're poisonous or anything else, you're rolling across the bottom of the floor like your father should be doing." With that, she picked Xion up into her cupped palms and the group set off.

They explored random caves and coves, looking for long-forgotten valuables even. Upon crossing the first creature that could speak, Riku was the only one that didn't nearly have a heart attack. Vexen pulled out some sort of tablet and pen and began taking notes on the fish, asking it numerous questions until he got too personal. Then it huffed indignantly and swam off, leaving him helpless to follow after.

When they came to a fork in a tunnel, they debated on which direction to go toward. "I say right," Xion said. "We've taken mostly lefts this entire time. It's a miracle we haven't gone in a circle."

"Yes, but if we should go in a circle, from the starting point we can then start on making the lefts," Vexen said.

"Why the hell aren't there any mer-men here?" Larxene asked, upset that no one would see her fishy splendor. If that sounded weird, then I did my job.

"We're not to be spotted regardless," Vexen said matter of factly. "Now, all in favor of a left turn, raise your…er…fins? Um, Xion dear, I can't tell if you are or if you're not…"

Xion looked to the shark. "What are you vouching for?" she asked him.

Riku shrugged as much as a shark could. "Makes no difference to me. I suppose there's nothing wrong with a right turn."

Xion looked happy enough to do a backflip. Riku agreed with her! "Alright, well, two of four say take a right. Larxene doesn't count since she doesn't care one way or the other. So I guess we win." She stuck her tongue out at the scientist.

Vexen sighed. "You win this round, but only because daddy hasn't the means to really retaliate back."

Riku led the way and started down the tunnel, Larxene following after her. The farther they went, the darker it grew. Light shone ahead, but for the moment, their surroundings were pitch black. It was then that Xion found out that she could glow.

"Maybe I should lead," she teased Riku. The boy only gave a noncommittal grunt but didn't slow down his pace.

"You like him," Larxene hissed in what she could only hope was Xion's ear.

"Do not!" The urchin squeaked back.

"Please, the three blind mice could see it. You're flirting with him. Now, before you say anything else, I have a proposition to make. I'll try my best to hook you up with him. In return…you have to get me on a date with Axel."

If urchin couldn't cough before, Xion broke that record. She gave a gasping wheeze and violently shuddered. Her spines became harder and pricked Larxene, who with a yelp, dropped her. They had reached the other side of the tunnel by then, but the exit was a deep drop with seaweed at the bottom. Finding her again wasn't going to be easy.

"My baby!!!" Vexen screamed, staring with horror filled eyes at the patch where she fell in at. "Save my little girl! Please Larxene, I'll never ask you for anything else!"

The woman sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. "Fine, I'll find the damn urchin. But you owe me." She dived into the grass and began looking around. Riku on the other hand was exploring a sunken ship, ignoring the starfish's protests to stay with Larxene.

While each person was oblivious to their surroundings, they didn't notice the large shadow looming over them until it was too late. Slowly, Larxene was the first to see it. There was the option of yelling to Riku to look up, but…there was also the option to hide and let it ignore her, seeing as it hadn't spotted her amongst the seaweed.

She chose to save her own ass.

It was Vexen who noticed the other shark for Riku. "Oh no…oh no, no, no…"

"Look, I'm just waiting for Xion to be found, then we can continue on our way," Riku said, sighing. He rolled his eyes and that's when he also noticed the other shark. A much bigger shark at that. He was clearly out-ranked.

"Okay, and why didn't anyone see fit to warn me earlier?" He snorted. But now that the other shark had his attention, it went in for the kill.

"Eat him, he has more meat!" Vexen shouted. He detached himself from Riku and spun to the floor. Larxene saw him drifting closer to her spot and risked also being seen by the shark to reach out and grab him. In his fear, he latched on to her face.

"Aaagghh!! Get off me! Get him off me!" She screamed, clawing at the starfish. "It's like having his balls all in my face!" she yelled.

"Get back in the damn grass!" Vexen simultaneously howled. "Oh, I don't want to die! I _so _don't want to die!"

Larxene finally managed to rip him away from her skin and none too gently flung him into the seaweed. She looked up to see if the shark had noticed the commotion below, then froze. It was talking with Riku. Riku answered something it said with a shrug, who then also gave its own shrug before swimming off. The boy then floated down to join her.

"Okay, what was that?" She said

He shrugged yet again. "Thought I was someone he knew. Told him he got the wrong guy, we're just tourists passing through."

"Soo…he wasn't about to attack?" Larxene asked with disbelief.

"Guess not," Riku said, adding yet another shrug.

Larxene strangely didn't seem too happy about this though. "So I had Vexen's fishy privates all in my face for a threat that never existed?! This mission is over!"

She turned around and went back to the seaweed. Within a minute, she had located Vexen again, who was hiding under a black sea urchin that _wasn't _Xion. "Wrong urchin," she sneered at him. She raked her eyes over the area before reaching down and picking up the right one.

"Oh, I know that," Vexen said. "This one is bigger."

"Oh thanks, save your own ass while the rest of us die. And you wonder why I won't claim you," Xion sneered at him.

Larxene picked them both up. She simply flung Vexen back onto Riku, but had no choice but to continue holding the girl.

They continued their journey through other caves, trying to find the exit but instead coming across a tall structure made of rocks. The inside must've been hollow, for they could hear someone singing inside.

_Up where they walk, up where they run. Up where they stay all day in the sun. Wandering free…wish I could be…part of that world._

"Okay, we're not doing the sing-along thing here," Larxene muttered. Without giving any form of announcement, she swam into the cove.

"Oh, wasn't aware I had company!" A red-haired teenage mermaid said. "I'm Ariel. And who are you?"

"I'm the one telling you to shut the hell up because the world doesn't want to hear your pity party," The blonde said with her cruel sneer turned up to its max level. "Oh, and just so you know, I can actually _walk_."

That did it for Ariel. She burst into tears and left the room, a large lobster and yellow and blue fish following after her.

"Wow…was that actually necessary?" Riku asked. He stared at the exit with a regretful expression…like he had just missed out on quite a rare treat.

Xion caught the look and cleared her throat. "Look at this place. Quite the collection of stuff, eh?" Ugh…talking about your surroundings was as bad as talking about the weather. Either it was quite annoyingly obvious or just totally lame. In this case, that was doubly enforced considering the trove was filled with junk. Maybe the other mermaid thought it was fascinating, but to them, it wasn't anything new.

"Alright, we've done our exploring. I'm leaving, whether the rest of you are or not," Vexen said. He held up the tip of one of his points and cast open a portal right there. He pushed off of Riku yet again and swam toward it.

Xion went in next. Riku started toward it, but stopped and looked back at Larxene. "Coming?"

"Yeah…but let me just…" She picked up a gold bowling trophy off of a shelf of the cove and took it with her. "Little miss sing-along will hopefully be missing this," she said as she entered the dark portal.

With a wet flop, she and Riku landed on top of Vexen and Xion on the other side, back in their normal forms. Vexen happened to make this portal in someone else's room. Xaldin's.

The man didn't even wait to fully see who they were. Before they could get their bearings, several lances came flying at them. Thankfully, they all missed, sticking dangerously into the wall behind them.

"Whoa! Chill!" Xion tried to placate him. "We come in peace."

"Oh man guys…you can't just warp into my room and expect me to be fine with it. Next time, do try to at least get close to the Grey Room." Xaldin blew his door open and with it, sent the four of them flying out, crashing unceremoniously into the wall on the other side of the hall.

"Well then!" Vexen snapped, but the door was slammed in his face.

"I guess I'll go tell Xemnas we made it back in one piece," Riku said and headed to the Superior's office.

Larxene headed to her room with her new treasure, leaving Xion to seek out the solace of her two best friends. After that hellish mission, she could use their senseless banter.

* * *

HA!! No Axel, Xigbar, Zexion, Xemnas, or Saix in this chapter! I'm proud of myself! I harp on them a tad too much (can't you tell I like them a lot?). I decided to not really make Roxas the sole mission person since that would put the story at a bit of a standstill.

Anywho! Reviews are like hearts for Kingdom Hearts. You can never have too many of 'em!


	11. A Rise and Fall for Demyx

Note to self and others: Burning your arm trying to put up dinner, so not cool. I actually had to mutter to myself that I felt sorry for Vexen after he got the Axel treatment.

As for this chapter, it's a bit all over (see the length of it?) but I hope it's still entertaining regardless. And I know I'm updating kind of fast, but when I'm bored, I often write, and I'm not good with waiting for time to pass before posting those chapters, lol! Anywho, read it, like it, love it and review it!

**

* * *

A Rise and Fall for Demyx**

If Demyx had to think back on all the worst days he's had in his lives (both when he was a Nobody and the days of his Other), none would probably compare to this day. And all because he had to go on a mission with the lovely Miss Marluxia.

Xemnas must hate him.

Along on the team was Luxord and Lexaeus though, and neither one of them seemed too bad. If he could, he wanted to split things up and take Lexaeus' side. The big brute could do all the work, sparing him from showing the others his pathetic attempts at combat.

"I pick the chickenshit blonde over there for my side," Marluxia suddenly said, interrupting Demyx's thoughts. He gave him a beatific, thin smile. "Water and flowers always go nicely together."

If Demyx wasn't quaking in his boots already, he probably would've made a snide comment about how a guy has a girly ability such as flowers. But as it was, Dem was trying to live to see another day and angering this man wasn't how that would come about.

His nonexistent heart caught in his throat as he watched Luxord and Lexaeus walk away, looking quite pleased with the choice in pairings. Demyx watched them disappear, pleading with large watery eyes for them to turn around and save him from the Pink Menace.

"So, Daniel, let's get going," Marluxia addressed him.

"Um…it's actually pronounced Demyx," the blonde said, hating himself for how weak his voice was.

"Sure thing, Steve," the other said, and continued down the path that they were traveling on.

Yes, today was certainly the worst day of his lives.

~.~.~

"All we're doing is defeating a large heartless here," Lexaeus was saying to Luxord. They were hiding in the bushes, waiting for said heartless to appear in that area, where it was known to lurk. "Afterwards, we'll rendezvous back with Marluxia and Demyx again. This shouldn't take too long and—what are you doing?"

"Nothing, nothing…just wetting my whistle is all," Luxord said, hastily putting the cap back on a flask and pocketing it inside his robe.

"Luxord, please tell me you're not drinking on the job…"

"Oh, and what of you, hm?" Luxord turned to him. His eyes were unfocused and he kept blinking rapidly, as though he couldn't see Lexaeus from where he was crouched only two feet away. "You're crocheting! You have the audacity to judge me?" He tried to stand to yell some more, but Lex pulled him back down, a finger to his lips.

"Lower your voice, the heartless will hear us," he said. He let to of his arm and went back to his thread and needles. "Besides, this is a weapon of sorts. Drinking…is suicide on a mission like this. Sober up, please."

"How about you _shut up_, ha!" Luxord giggled, stumbling a few steps. "Ya know, I'm tired of waiting. I wanna speed things up—"

"NO!" Lexaeus shouted, knocking his hand down before he could alter time. "Has it ever occurred to you that you might mess up some important events if you keep going back and forth in time? Let's just let things play out at normal speed first. If things get botched, _then _you can rewind time."

Luxord blinked blearily at him. "You're an utter bore, you do know that right?"

"Better than drunk," Lexaeus muttered to himself. In front of them, the town common area was deserted. From between two of the tiny village houses came an extremely large Darkside, which basically resembled a regular heartless on major steroids.

"Looks like we've found our target," Lex whispered to Luxord. "Let's go." He stashed his crocheting materials into a sewing bag he had taken with him and put this under the bushes for safe keeping. Then he conjured his tomahawk weapon and silently crept out into the open. He paused though once he realized Luxord wasn't following him.

The flask was back to his lips and he was drinking from it like a camel.

"Luxord! What the hell did I—" Suddenly, he found himself flying across the open space and a strong pain coming from his side. Perhaps a few broken ribs?

"Whoo! Alright! Get 'em Lex!" Luxord cheered, not realizing that his comrade's flying body wasn't something of his choosing. "Atta boy, mate! You can…you can…whoa, I feel funny…" He stumbled again, and ended up directly in front of the heartless.

"Wow, what are they feeding you guys?" The man said out loud. "Anyways…wanna play some poker?"

The creature regarded Luxord for a moment with impassive eyes before whipping back and knocking him into the air as well.

"Bloody hell! How rude of you!" He actually managed to correct himself in midair and by using the natural gliding ability given to Nobodies, he floated back to the heartless. "Now, I believe you owe me an apo…apolo…say sorry!" He slurred.

This time, the Darkside leaned down to the ground and formed several smaller versions of itself. They ran around aimlessly, not seeing a victim in sight.

"Yeah…see, that works if I were on the ground…" Luxord said. He tilted his head back again as he downed the last of whatever contents the flask had held. "I'm gonna…I'm gonna mess you up. You…*burp*…ugh…what was I gonna say?" He blinked a few more times, then randomly waved his arm. The large creature was suddenly turned into a die, no taller than one of its minions.

"Oh, fuck me," Luxord muttered. "Didn't mean to do that…" He waved his arm again and his cards flew out and attacked the die. "Ohhh…that wind feels nice…" He simply stood there smiling stupidly to himself as the cards whipped around him. He only saw it as excellent air conditioning.

Sometime in the middle of this, he heard Lexaeus give a groan near him. Opening his eyes, he saw the man limping toward him, holding his side. "You…defeated him drunk?" he asked.

"Wha--? Defeated who?" Luxord looked around. There was nothing left of the heartless that had been there.

"That heartless…you destroyed him and yet you're completely smashed," Lexaeus said dryly. He was perfectly sober and got his ass handed to him. Luxord wasn't normal.

"Come, Lexy, let's go and have a celebra…heh-heh…bra…Um, let's go have some drinks because we beat that guy…or something…" He stumbled yet again, but Lexaeus caught him this time. While still being supported, Luxord reached into his cloak for his wallet. He flipped it open and dumped it upside down.

Not a damn thing came out.

"Aw, fuck me…looks like I'm broke, mate," he giggled sheepishly. "Ahh, who cares! I know my boy Xiggy has some. Away to the castle!" He pointed in a random direction.

"Marluxia and Demyx are in the other direction," Lexaeus said with a deep frown. "And you're going to have all sorts of liver problems if you keep drinking like that."

"Memememe," Luxord mimicked in this high pitched voice. "Can it, luv. You're giving me a headache."

Lexaeus decided not to mention to him that the drinking must've already been taking its toll on him, but mainly because Luxord would find out on his own very soon enough.

~.~.~

Demyx and Marluxia were required to gather intel about the world they were currently in. At least Marluxia had let Luxord and Lexaeus handle the heartless, but Demyx was terrible with social interaction as well. It wasn't that he was shy, but it always seemed like nobody wanted him around. How was he supposed to gather information if no one would speak to him?

"Speak to them first," Marluxia said.

"What?"

"The woman over there. From what is already known, the Superior believes she's quite knowledgeable about this place. So, you should speak to her to see what she knows." He smiled his cunning smile at him.

"Uh…okay…" Demyx really didn't know what he was going to say, but figured that maybe winging it would work. He walked up to the woman sitting at the front of the restaurant and sat next to her on a stool. "Hiya," he said cheerily, struggling to keep his voice from shaking.

She gave him a bored stare at first, then did a double take and looked quite interested. "Hello," she said back. Was she grinning?

"Um…the name is Demyx." He held out a hand, and smiled when she shook it. Maybe this was going to be easier than he'd thought!

"Lola," she told him. "So Demyx, never seen you around. New here?"

The two began to converse easily after that and Demyx made sure to remind himself to tell Marluxia that he could shove his better-than-thou attitude up his ass. He _could _chat with women! He could hold his own! He wasn't totally useless! He…was being led out of the restaurant by the woman…

"Whoa, where are we going?" He asked as she pulled him along.

"My place, silly," she giggled. And then winked.

Wait, where _was _Marluxia? "Umm…I have a friend waiting on me…"

"Your friend can wait." She left no room for argument here. They soon approached her apartment and she all but dragged him up the stairs to the second floor. Just before she pulled him inside, he caught sight of the androgynous Marluxia peeking from around a corner. He gave him a cruel smile before disappearing in a cloud of darkness.

Demyx was now completely alone.

~.~.~

Sometime later (the blonde had lost track of time), he found himself stumbling from the apartment on weak legs and with torn clothing hanging from his frame. He would've portaled back to the castle from there, but it would blow the cover of Nobodies existing and the others would think something had happened to him when he didn't show up at their meeting spot.

That didn't mean he couldn't do it at all. The second he rounded the apartment complex's corner, he quickly formed a portal around himself and tumbled through it. Mere seconds later and he fell through the other side, at the feet of the other three members.

"You don't look so good Demyx. What happened to you?" Lexaeus asked, reaching down to help him up, despite his own pain.

"I…I don't know…" Demyx mumbled, eyes wide with fright. His hair also wasn't standing up like it usually would be, but was half flat, resembling trampled grass. "She—she took me into her apartment…and…and…"

"Demyx, did you do something _naughty _with her?" Marluxia questioned with a knowing sneer.

"I didn't want to!" Demyx began to yell. "She just threw me on the bed, talking about 'I can make you feel really good' and stuff! I tried to fight her off, but I don't like hitting girls or fighting at all and then she just totally ripped my jacket off of me and…and…she _raped _me!" Demyx put his face in his hands and bawled.

The area was quiet for a moment, save for Demyx's sobs. It was Luxord who finally spoke first. "Sure that wasn't Larxene?"

Demyx gave a shuddering gulp. "Thank heavens no." Marluxia on the other hand cast a dirty glare at the Brit, but the man didn't see it.

"Well, today was quite eventful," Lexaeus said. He knew that Xemnas was going to have his head if those two hadn't completed their half of the mission, seeing as he was the highest ranking of them.

As though reading his mind, Marluxia said, "Well, Damsel, I try to help you out and you still botch it. A woman totally interested in you and you couldn't handle the job."

Through his parted fingers, Demyx looked up at him. "You mean…she wasn't our target?"

"HA! In the words of Xigbar, as if. Someone that knows everyone and everything about a town usually isn't going to be in their teens. They're going to be—"

"She said she was twenty!" Demyx objected.

This time, everyone burst out laughing. "She was seventeen, stupid," Marluxia cackled.

A million thoughts began to race through the blonde's head. _Lawsuit. Scandalous. Underaged. Jail. Butt rape. Weakling. Pwnd. Lies. This is absolute and utter bullshit. _

"Let's get the hell out of here!" he shouted. The echo of his voice hadn't even died down before he ran into his portal, leaving it open not as a curtsey to the others, but simply because he was too shocked to remember to close it behind him.

As soon as he got to the castle, he went straight to his room and locked the door. Nobody saw him for the rest of the day.

Lexaeus went back to his crocheting, dropping Luxord off at Xigbar's room at his request. The two could be heard singing old time bar songs while playing random Irish tunes at the same time.

Thus it was left to Marluxia to give the mission report. When he handed it to Xemnas, the man read it quietly at first, until he hit a part that made him reread it. Finally he looked up at the Graceful Assassin. "You mean to tell me that Demyx slept with someone on this mission?"

"Yes, it would appear something like that happened," Marluxia said in careless tone, examining his fingernails.

"Well?"

"Well what, Superior?"

"Well, how did he do?"

"…sleeping with this person?"

"Yes!"

Marluxia flicked his hair over his shoulder. "If I had to give my opinion, he's traumatized and will never do such a thing again. But sir, did you not read the part that this was just a teenage girl?"

"Pfft, please!" Xemnas laughed. "I'd fret on that except for the fact that Demyx was the traumatized one, not her! Now this is good ole' fashioned comedy! Make sure you tell the others about this!" He leaned over in his seat with how hard he was laughing.

Marluxia gave a small nod and vanished.

"Wow, you're a bastard," Saix said from where he was standing beside Xemnas.

"Ahh, we're just picking with the boy. We used to do the same thing to you back in school. Remember how kids kept calling you Moony, after one of the Harry Potter characters?"

"Okay, I'm done here," Saix muttered, and also vanished.

Xemnas sighed and looked out the window to Kingdom Hearts. "These men lack vision!" he said to it.

But of course the moon was silent.

"Evidently, you do too…" the man said with a grimace, and with a heavy sigh, he returned to a mount of papers before him.

* * *

This chapter wasn't exactly planned out, so again, forgive me if it had a run-on feeling about it. I'm just trying to touch up on all of the members so that I'm not writing chapters with everyone conglomerated into one all the time. Anyways, as usual, please review!


	12. Riding Shotgun

Not sure what these longer chapters mean, but this one came out twice the length of what I normally write. This chapter features some similar themes from the last chapter, and forgive me for that. But it's with new characters and a new situation, so hopefully it'll be more interesting this time.

Also, there are two awesome pictures of Organization XIII cars by the Deviantartist **vvmasterdrfan**. Usually just typing that into Google images (Organization XIII car) will make it the very first picture to pop up (I love how he says Axel destroyed the first one, lol!). Also, he makes EPIC Keyblades...dear gods, I wish I could be that talented! Anywho, go check his stuff out.

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Riding Shotgun**

"I'm entrusting it to you and you only Zexion. Don't fail me." Xemnas handed a key ring with only a single key to the boy.

"No worries, Superior. I'll bring it back in mint condition."

"Yeah, speaking of which…mind giving it a wash as well? I wanna make sure I'm always able to see my beautiful face on the surface."

"Um…I guess…" _Don't have too many choices, do I? _He mentally grumbled.

"Attaboy. Oh, I didn't give Xigbar or Xaldin any missions today, so I suppose you should take them along with you."

"What about Xigbar?!" The man said excitedly, appearing from nowhere and hanging from the ceiling. "Where are we going?"

Zexion froze in his spot. When he finally managed to gain control over his limbs sometime later, he promptly walked to a wall and began bashing his head against it repeatedly. He kept doing so until Xaldin walked in the room, saw him, and dragged him away. He'd probably be brain damaged if he hadn't.

Since Zexion was the one with the key, he was guaranteed a front seat. Xigbar and Xaldin did rock paper scissors over who rode passenger. Xaldin won, but Xigbar shot him in the kneecaps and took the seat regardless.

As Xaldin moaned in pain in the back, Zexion adjusted the front to where he was more comfortable. It took him nearly forever to get the rearview mirror right, but he knew it'd be worth it in the end.

"Alright, shorty, you sure you can drive this thing? I mean, look how far you had to pull up the seat! Can you even see over the dashboard?" Xigbar asked.

"_Yes_, I _can_ thank you very much!" Zexion told him. He was quite capable of driving…and even better so without the peanut gallery along for the ride. "Put your damn seatbelt on," he grumbled as he started the engine.

Xigbar's hand on the side closest to his door twitched on a trigger, but he only visibly showed a lopsided grin as he buckled up. "As if I'm doing this because you told me to. It's just that I believe in safety first."

Zexion threw him a very disbelieving stare and backed out of the large underground garage. It was a bit dizzying how it wound up to the upper level but once there, he quickly shifted the vehicle into fourth gear and slammed on the gas. He wanted this trip over as quickly as possible.

Xaldin had finally stopped whimpering like a wounded dog and made a request for music. Zexion acted like he hadn't heard it and was hoping Xigbar would do the same, until the man reached forward and switched on the radio anyways. Each station seemed worse than the last to him and it was all he could do to stop from ripping it out and chucking it in the road. But Xemnas would have a cow if he did that. And if there was one thing that was worse than a rant from him about Kingdom Hearts it was a reprimanding rant. At least KH was just a moon. When it was directed at a person, it could very well go on forever.

Up ahead was a red light. As they waited at the intersection, Zexion looked up into the rearview mirror to see Xaldin having a staring match with a little girl in the car next to theirs. The man seemed to have caught something out the corner of his eye and blinked. The girl cheered inside her car and stuck her tongue out at him. Xaldin only grinned and showed her one of his lances. This quickly made her stop and face front, casting fearful glances at him every now and then.

Then the whirlwind lancer addressed his two companions. "Is there some reason why Axel is walking up to the car?"

"What?!" Xigbar and Zexion shouted at the same time.

Axel chose that moment to splatter himself on the windshield. "What's up, guys? New game you're playing or something?"

"As if. We're on a mission to…um…what the hell are we doing?" Xigbar asked Zexion.

"We're paying bills and getting a car wash," Zexion answered with the driest voice he could manage. "Now, if you don't mind Axel, please get off the car. Not to mention, you're making a public spectacle like that."

Axel gave him a weird look. "Er…okay. But I think you guys should know you're still at the castle. You've been sitting in the garage for the past half hour."

"WHAT THE FUCK?!!" Xaldin and Xigbar screamed.

"Whoa. You mean, you guys…ohhh! Another illusion trick!" Axel laughed. "Wow Zex, you sure have bad timing for those."

"I…I wasn't even aware I was doing it…" Zexion stammered, trying not to look at the other two, who looked ready to kill him. "I honestly thought we had left!"

"That's it, move over shorty!" Xigbar said. Zexion tried to latch onto the steering wheel, but Xigbar only easily grabbed him and started ripping him from his spot.

While all this was going on, Saix walked up to the car. "What is the meaning of this?" he demanded.

Zexion quite rudely began rolling up his window on him. Before it could go all the way up though, Saix stuck his claymore inside, halting anymore progress.

"Thankfully Xemnas has not noticed this, but you four are completely out of line right now. Axel, off the car. Both Xigbar _and _Zexion, get in the back. _I'm_ driving. Leave the keys in the ignition."

Both were higher ranked than him and didn't take too kindly to being told what to do. They immediately began protesting, each complaining about the other and how it was the others' fault that everything had gone so badly.

Saix closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, they were completely yellow, and his hair stood on end. His teeth bared and the knuckles squeezing his weapon were completely white from the force he was holding it with. "Get in the backseat. Now," he said quietly.

This was the first time any of them had seen a shred of his berserker mode and didn't care to see anymore. Fearfully, they scrambled to the backseat, crawling over Xaldin's wounded legs, which caused him to start groaning in pain again. Zexion quickly clapped a hand over his mouth while Xigbar shook his head in a warning to be quiet.

With that deed done, Saix got in the car, readjusting the seat and mirror. The other door opened and in popped Axel, who gleefully closed it behind him. "Alright! Road trip!"

"Axel, get out," Saix told him. His berserker form was gone, but it was clear he was still pissed.

"Uh, how about no?" Axel told him with a bright smile. He put on his seatbelt and drummed his finger on his leg as he waited for them to start moving.

The others held their breath, waiting to see what Saix was going to do.

"Fine. Whatever," the Diviner said.

"Wait, what the hell?!" Xigbar, Xaldin and Zexion shouted from the back. They would've said more but a glare from Saix silenced them.

Axel thankfully wasn't a big talker, but he would point out the oddest of things. "Slugger bugger!" He shouted out once, punching Saix in the arm. The other man immediately hit his berserker state and the redhead cowered back as much as the car would allow him.

Xaldin tried the same thing on Zexion but the force came a bit too strong. And fast. He didn't punch his arm, but his chest and still feeling the pain from when Xigbar had shot him there, he folded into himself, trying his hardest to stifle his own whimpers.

So that left the vehicle with two physically hurt members, one with his pride quite bruised and another with his feelings hurt from his old friend. Saix had transformed back into his regular state, but there was no telling when he was going to explode again.

It would be the one-eyed member who would later say he saw it coming but claimed he was helpless to stop it.

Saix had reached the utilities building to pay for the castle's bills. There were few parking spaces, seeing as it was a busy weekday and the first of the month at that. Everyone with their checks were also trying to pay their bills as well. They circled the parking lot twice looking for a spot until ahead they could see a car pulling out from theirs. What luck! Patiently, they waited for it to back out and leave. Saix had even begun to tap his fingers on the steering wheel, humming to himself.

Once the other car was out of the way, Saix began to drive forward into the spot. It was then that disaster struck. Another car from seemingly nowhere swerved in front of them and took the space, only barely missing hitting their own vehicle.

"No. Hell no." Saix whispered.

"Wait, Saix, just let it go!" Axel pleaded.

"Stay here," the man told them, as though he hadn't heard the redhead. He unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed out.

The other driver was only starting to open their door when Saix reached him. In the few seconds it took to get from their car to the other one, Saix had went berserk. He seemingly patiently waited for the man to open his door. The guy was oblivious to what awaited him on the outside. Without warning, Saix attacked. He grabbed the man and flung him across the parking lot, not caring where or what he hit.

"Get out of my way!!!" He rudely shouted. With the guy out of commission, he went to work on the car. Spikes popped out of the top part of his claymore and he used these to shred the tires. "All shall be lost to you!" He shouted out, basically to no one since the owner couldn't hear him. Strangely, he felt laughter building up in him, so as he stood on top of the vehicle, cracking the windshield with the weapon, he laughed like an idiot to himself.

"Sai, man…you can't do this!" Axel said, having gotten out of the car anyways. He reached up and tried to pull his friend down but the other only snarled at him, then went back to his demolition. Axel sighed. He conjured his chakrams, and aimed for a spot that wouldn't kill his friend. He took him out at the waist.

With a thunderous scream, Saix stumbled, then fell onto the hood of the car. His head hit the surface hard on the way down, knocking him out and also again altering him back to his normal form. Axel wasted no time in grabbing him and dragging him back to the car.

Zexion had taken the time to run and pay the bills so that when Axel finally managed to get him into the backseat next to Xaldin (Xigbar had taken the driver's seat), they were finished and ready to go. Axel hopped passenger again and with lightning speed, they tore out of there.

"Whoo, wasn't that something!" Xigbar cheered. "Wow…never knew Moony there had it in him. Well…at least, not to get pissed over something like that. I think I like his style."

Axel glanced up into the rearview mirror to find Zexion and Xaldin copying his expression of rolling their eyes.

"So, Xem wants this bad puppy washed too, eh?" Xigbar asked. "Well, let's see here…" He came to a busy part of the town, looking around until he spotted something that caught his interest. "Ah, there we go!"

Zexion peaked out the window, then gasped in horror. "He said carwash, not _Girls Gone Wild_!! What the hell is this?!"

"It's a carwash, my man!" Xig said cheerily, never taking his eyes off the girls in tiny bikinis who were washing the vehicles. "Demyx actually got laid a few days ago. Play your cards right and maybe you can too."

Zexion _really _wished he hadn't heard that. He looked over at Xaldin, who was rubbing his knees remorsefully, every now and then giving a deep sigh. He wouldn't be able to get out of the car with his injuries.

"Don't worry, I'll stay here too," Zexion told him. Now Xaldin looked like he wished he hadn't heard that.

Axel and Xigbar hopped out the moment the car stopped moving and began their hunt for their prey. Actually, Xigbar grabbed to him every girl he passed by (not that they really wanted to be there, he was just the master of space and had a weird way of literally drawing them in). Axel took his time searching.

Zexion didn't want to stay in the backseat with the unconscious Saix, lest he wake up and attack. He got out to move to the front really quick, but was spotted by one of the girls.

"Is this yours?" She asked him. He thanked the heavens it wasn't in a flirtatious way but could she _please _cover up? It was quite annoying (distracting) having so much of her cleavage showing.

"No, it is not mine. It's my boss'." He told her.

Very dimly, he could hear Xaldin face-palming.

"Oh…well, need it washed?" She asked.

Zexion forced himself not to give the sarcastic retort 'No duh I want it washed. Isn't that what car washes are for?' but instead just said, "Yes, thank you."

He pulled out one of his Sudoku books and tried to ignore her as she worked, until she came to the windshield. Again, it was very, _very _annoying (distracting) to do his puzzles when there was cleavage pressed against the glass, soapy water running down the surface and—

_What the hell?! _He bit his lip as a substitute for pinching himself and went back to his book, obstinately refusing to look up until she was finished.

He thought he was rid of her until she knocked on the window, startling him. He jumped about a foot in the air, losing the book as it fell under the seat. Very slowly he rolled down the window, making sure to look her directly in the eyes. "Yes?"

"That'll be twenty five," She told him. That was then he remembered that Xemnas hadn't given him any munny for the wash; it would have to come out of his own pocket.

That of course didn't sit too well with him, but he was ready to get back regardless. He handed her the bills and as she took it, she shook his hand. When she walked away, she left something in his palm. A piece of paper that he didn't dare open.

He fished his book out from under the seat and tried to go back to solving it, but his hands were suddenly shaking too hard. His mind could only focus on the giggling and the sounds of water hoses around him and it was starting to seriously tick him off. Finally with a frustrated groan, he reached across to the driver's seat and honked the horn loudly to tell Xigbar and Axel to hurry the hell up.

They came back to the car with brighter smiles than when they left, quite content with their adventures amongst the scantily clad girls. Zexion was disgusted.

"Hey, what's that?" Axel asked as he climbed into the driver's seat this time. He pointed to the piece of paper sticking out of Zexion's book, which he had unknowingly used as a bookmark. He reached over for it and before the boy could stop him, he was opening it up. "Holy crap! Xig, he got a phone number!"

"What?! Really? Sexy Zexy is open for business!" The other man shouted, and noogied the boy.

"Call me that again and Saix's berserker mode will look like child's play to what I'll do," Zexion growled, knocking his hand away.

"Whatever, shortstop. So, gonna call her?" He asked.

"As if!" The illusionist snorted.

"That phrase is copyrighted, you can't use it," Xigbar told him. "Anyways, if not you, then I will." He reached up to the front seat and grabbed it away from Axel, adding it to the stash he already had.

Zexion was seriously tired of the talk of women, but he supposed this is what happened when you lived in a castle full of mainly men, where the two other females that were there were under age or a psychotic bitch.

He decided that to hurry the ride along, he'd try something new. He cast a portal in the car, enveloping everyone in it. Axel thankfully had fast reflexes because when the car came through the other side, it was only seconds away from hitting the back of the garage wall.

"Never again, dude," Axel told him. Zexion gave a 'like I care' shrug and got out. The pyro and Xigbar carried the still unconscious Saix to his room and Xaldin limped out after them to get himself to the infirmary.

As Xemnas watched them enter, he almost asked what had happened, but Zexion had already told him the car was fine and in great condition and that was about all he really cared for at the moment. Oh, and his Saix-papi. Vexen was usually the one to oversee the infirmary, but Saix was special and he wanted to make sure he got the best treatment possible.

He made his way to the berserker's room as Xigbar and Axel laid him on his bed. He was about to walk further in when they stopped him. "I wouldn't do that if I were you," Axel cautioned. "He just had one of his crazy spells and there's no telling if he'll be rabid still when he wakes up."

Xemnas' eyes grew wide with worry. "Saixy's upset? But…why?"

The other two tried to ignore the pet names. "Long story dude. Just…stay away if you value your life." Xigbar told him and both walked away.

Xemnas made sure they had rounded the corner before he placed a tennis ball inside Saix' room. There, he'd have that to play with when he woke up.

* * *

Hey, I actually gave Xaldin some of the spotlight! Although Xigbar wounding him kind of dulled it…Xiggy needs to have those guns taken away from him; he's seriously abusing his power and his team mates! xD! Anywho, as I said above, also forgive the similar theme from the last chapter with the girls. I just figured it'd be comical to have something like that happen with Zexion, lol! Next chapter is actually already written, but I'll hold off from posting it too soon...I've already updated a million times this month. Eek!

Well, as always, please be kind and review!


	13. Duality

Wow, I never knew how addicting the Sims can be until I finally played a game here recently! Well...not so much the Sims themselves. I got Sims 2 because a friend showed me that I could download a lot of custom outfits and such to create the KH characters (3 doesn't yet have all of that, I don't believe...). Ahh...that was beautiful. Although for the life of me, I can't understand why everyone hated Marluxia so much (he was much nicer than the one I have here! Well...maybe not...lol!). And the sweetest thing of all--Zemyx. They actually did that on their own!

...Okay, so maybe I helped them out a bit with Demy flirting some, but still!!! They were mere moments away from popping the question even...until my game quit on me, -_-" Granted, it wasn't compatible with my computer to begin with, so it's an amazement it worked that long. Well, I sent it back to get another version. Let's try this again, shall we!

Anywho, I think I really had fun with this chapter. Something about the interactions of these two characters I always thought would be excellent. I'll let you guys read it to find out what I mean. ^_^

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**Duality**

Roxas' missions in themselves weren't what bothered him about them, but the fact that 99% of the time, he was doing them alone. Everyone else was grouped with each other and yet he was made to go solo. Hell, Xion, the other Keyblade wielder, even got to go in a group. Granted, Roxas would rather be by himself than have to be on a mission with Vexen or Larxene. He pitied her there.

So, here he was in Traverse Town, trying to find some witch named…Maleficent? He wasn't sure why he was expected to destroy her if she wasn't a heartless but Saix had told him that it was what Xemnas wanted when he gave him the mission order. Of course, Saix had been pissy about waking up to find that tennis ball in his room and had went on another berserker rant, so that could've very well influenced why he chose one of the younger members of the Org to do such a dangerous job.

They needed to get some tranquilizer shots for that man.

He checked the backpack he was carrying and found that he had failed to visit Vexen's lab to restock on medical supplies. Figuring he'd need them, he headed into a nearby shop that seemed to sell a wide variety of items. Upon entering, he was pretty much blown away to find three small ducks manning the store.

"Hiya! Welcome!" The one at the counter said. "Whatcha lookin' to buy?"

Roxas was very tempted to just leave. He'd seen some weird things on his travels, but talking animals that had the same intelligence level (for the most part) as humans was new. Er, ignoring the talking tiger that mauled him in the 100 Acre Woods.

"I…just need some medical supplies," he told them hesitantly, expecting them not to have anything.

"Sure thing!" The three of them said and began running around to various parts of the store to bring back random items of all sorts.

"Here, a potion made from a family recipe! One gulp of this stuff and you'll feel your strength coming back immediately!" The blue shirted duck said.

"No, that's too weak! Try the hi-potion! Nothing works better!" The one with the green shirt said.

"Aw, phooey! Both of you are wrong! Take an elixir! That way if you have magical abilities, it restores both your health and your magic!" The red shirt insisted.

Magical abilities? Well…he at times could utilize many of the same powers as the other members of the Organization. Axel's flames, Xaldin's wind, Larxene's electricity…even Vexen's ice. Is that magic?

"Fine, I think I'll take the elixir," Roxas told them. "It suits both my needs."

"Alright, that'll be 3000 munny."

"What?! How much do you think I'm carrying?"

They all wagged a finger at him. "3000 munny, nothing lower."

Roxas frowned at them, then suddenly glanced a ladder situated up on the ceiling with a trap door in front of it. "Now what's up here…" he muttered, walking closer.

"Nothing!!!" The ducks shouted, running in front of him to block his way. "That's just the attic! Nothing's up there!"

"Oh? Really now? Then I guess you wouldn't mind showing me what's up there then if it's nothing. Or perhaps even the police?"

The glare they gave him would've melted steel. "Fine," the red one said, evidently the leader. "One minute, and then you better be back down here." He jumped on the counter and used that to latch on to the ladder. His brothers did the same, grabbing on to his feet to add more weight. As one, they pulled the ladder down, simultaneously opening the attic door.

Cautiously, Roxas climbed up them. He peeked over the floorboards to glimpse inside. There were a bunch of small white creatures floating around with tiny black wings and a red ball sticking off their heads. They were zipping around adding different materials to different pots, some over the fire place, others on a table. Along one wall was a stack of boxes, only barely visible under the sheet that covered them.

This wasn't an ordinary attic. This was an underground shop.

He climbed all the way up, figuring if need be, it wouldn't be anything to take out the white creatures. "Hey, the three guys downstairs sent me up. I'm the new guy on board. So, what's going on?" Back when he first joined the Org, he was taught about blending in by Axel (ironic considering the redhead couldn't fit in anywhere to save his life). Axel had shown him how to word his conversations to where he gained the most information as possible while revealing nothing about himself, not even a name. He was proud to be putting his friends' lessons to use.

"Kupo!" One of the white things said, and zipped off.

"Um…what's a kupo?" He asked.

"Kupo! Kupo!" Another one chirped.

"Yeah, I hear you. But what _is _a kupo?"

"KUPO!" They all shouted at him.

"English, mother fucker, do you speak it?!" Roxas shouted back. These things were seriously starting to piss him off.

They might not have spoke English, but they surely understood it. With a collective huff, they moved over to him and began pushing him back downstairs. "W-wait! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cuss you out! Alright, I'm going, I'm going!" He shrugged the floating teddy bear things off and climbed back down the ladder. At the foot of the steps, he was about to say something to the ducks, but caught sight of someone else in the store.

That brown pointy hair. Those strange clothes and size 23 shoes. That lame pewter silver chain with a crown on it.

Sora. His arch rival.

"Oh, hello Roxas," Sora spoke first. "Wasn't aware you had the money to be shopping in here."

Roxas' dislike for Marlene (Marluxia and Larxene) didn't even come close to his loathing of this boy. "Yeah, well I actually do. I'm just stocking up before I go and defeat the all powerful Maleficent."

The three ducks gasped and shuddered at the name. Sora only laughed.

"Maleficent, huh? Coincidently, the King—yeah, that's King Mickey to you—asked me to do the same. Now, which of us is more qualified to do it? A _nobody _like you, or me, who was personally recommended by His Majesty?"

Sora had a way of putting a bitter taste in Roxas' mouth and he wanted nothing more than to spit on the boy and backslap the crap out of him. "I think whoever actually has the skills to defeat her should be the one to do it. Screw recommendations. Just because I operate on the down-low, doesn't mean I'm not qualified."

"Ha, whatever," Sora said. He turned to the ducks and bought a few bottles of the elixir. The very elixir Roxas was going to have difficulties getting just one of. The boy pulled out a wad of money folded neatly over each other and counted off the amount he needed, slowly and deliberately, while making direct eye contact with Roxas and not attempting to hold back the cocky smirk on his face.

Once he had paid for his items, he stood back and waited for Roxas to buy his stuff. "I don't need you watching over me," Roxas told him. "I'm quite capable of buying my stuff on my own."

"Mm-hmm, I know. Don't care though." Sora said.

There wasn't a way around it. He ordered his one elixir, earning a scoff from the other boy. Roxas ignored him, although he came dangerously close to going into his own berserker mode when he heard the cackles getting louder as he counted out his meager earnings to pay for it. If nothing else, this gave him more incentive to destroy more heartless to give himself a much needed raise.

Sora left out the store first, but rather than holding the door open for Roxas, he let it swing shut behind him, nearly hitting the blonde. "Oh, opps," Sora said without turning around.

Now was his chance. If he just whipped out his Keyblade and cracked this kid one on the noggin, he'd never have to deal with him again! But…that'd be playing unfair and if he'd learned anything at the Org, it was to have a bit of dignity. No, he'd save Sora for another time.

At the door to the Third District, the brunette turned around and faced him. "My intel has informed me that she's in here. How about you stay outside so you don't get hurt, hm?"

Roxas knew that many of the members had been doing this, but it was hard to resist. "As if! I can take her out. Oh, and Sora?" Here, he whipped out both of the Keyblades that he'd been working on since their first meeting. "Yeah, I'm packin' plenty of heat. But thank you for being so concerned."

"_As if,_" Sora mimicked back. "I don't need you getting in my way."

"Likewise."

Sora huffed indignantly and stomped inside the doors. Roxas followed after him but was suddenly swallowed into darkness. He felt as though he were moving, like falling through air. Seconds later, he was proven right when he crash landed on hard ground. He wanted to lay there to gain his bearings, but he noticed Sora was already up and on his feet. No way was he going to let him do all the work! He got up too and readied both of his blades.

In front of them was a large black dragon, breathing green flames all over the area. Wow…Saix never mentioned this in the mission details. No matter. He jumped into the air and began floating around, looking for a good attack point.

Sora decided to take a more offensive approach and charged directly at her. She lashed her tail at him, but he nimbly jumped on it. As she flailed it back and forth, he let go once it got close to her head and jumped on that instead. Standing on her back spikes, he began to hack away with his Keyblade, causing her to thrash back and forth even more.

At this rate, Sora was going to get all the glory and Roxas wasn't ever going to get a hit off of her. With Maleficent distracted with the speck attacking her head, Roxas went in for the stomach. He got two good hits in before she swatted both him and Sora away from her, sending him flying across the room.

"Argh, she tore my shirt!" Sora yelled. "That's it, no more Mr. Nice Guy!" He did this weird power up thing and in the next moment, he was wearing a white and black outfit. How in the hell?!!

What really ticked Roxas off was that he even had two Keyblades!!! All his work for his, gone in a flash!

"Don't just sit there, dummy! If we're going to beat her, we're actually going to need to work together," Sora told him. Without asking, he pulled Roxas up from the ground and as one, they both charged her.

Strangely though, it was as if Roxas knew his strategy. He didn't know where the knowledge had come from, but in the middle of their running, he grabbed Sora by his arms and flung him around in a circle until he had been thrown into the air. On his way up, Sora grabbed his arm and pulled him up too, flinging him higher than what he himself had went. With them both in the air, they came down as a duo and went back to work on the dragon.

Several times they did those strange combos, completely in sync as though they had practiced it a million times already. It just felt so…natural.

_Oh gods, what am I saying?! _Roxas thought, moving automatically to dodge another swing from her claws. _He's your rival! This isn't supposed to be fun or cool or…whatever the hell this is! _

Yet time and time again they would attack in unison. It wasn't too long before the dragon finally gave a cry of defeat and crashed onto the floor. Its body disintegrated into black smoke, carried away by the wind.

Sora transformed back into his regular outfit (which now looked as good as new), then held out his Keyblade while the outline of a large crown formed around his feet. A grayish cloud swirled around them and next thing Roxas knew, they were surrounded by more dark grey clouds with peeks of sunlight shining through. Was this heaven?!

"Whoa…trippy…"

"Eh, I come here often to seal keyholes," Sora said. He pointed his Keyblade upwards and a beam shot out of it. It connected with a keyhole, which responded by glowing bright white. Once the flash died away, the clouds faded and they were back in the Third District again. "See? Nothing to it."

Roxas sighed. "If I actually admitted that you were more skilled with your Keyblade than me, would you leave me the hell alone?"

Sora laughed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Maybe. But are you really going to give up that easily?"

Roxas thought about it, then also smiled. "You know what? You're right. Don't count me out just yet!"

Sora nodded to him. "Good, because one day, I'd actually like to fight you. Can't have you getting soft on me."

The other shook his head as he walked on by. Just as he passed him, he whispered something out of his own accord. "You make a good other." With that, he cast open a portal and left.

* * *

I tried to mix a lot of elements from the games into here, and yet not totally have it parallel to them. I'm still debating with how much of this is going to be synced with the real story line. Reviews are always appreciated!


	14. Promises, Promises

Things get kind of touching in this chapter, so excuse the lack of comedy. Bleh, this is two chapters in a row that have kind of had that sort of theme! Maybe pre-written chapters aren't such a good idea…

**

* * *

Promises, Promises  
**

Aside from her 'father' constantly hovering over her, Xion would have to say that she was enjoying her time with the Organization. She really didn't want to dwell on the part about her supposedly being created only to help further their agenda…thoughts like that made her want to at the very least kill off Vexen.

That's where friends came in though. She, Roxas and Axel had taken up having ice cream on the clock tower of Twilight Town. Often times they'd meet there and chat about simply anything. Today was no different.

"So, you basically made up with him?" Axel asked.

"Well…I wouldn't say that. But I guess I don't hate him _quite _as much now. He's still an annoying prick," Roxas said easily, taking a bite off his bar.

"Why did you call him 'other'?" Xion wondered.

"Hell if I know. It kind of just…came out. I seriously hope he's not my other! But…well, it would kind of explain the in sync movements and him having a Keyblade as well."

"_I _have a Keyblade as well, you know," Xion said with a playful huff. "But I'm not a part of you. I can't be; I'm a Nobody as well."

"You know, I get _really _sick and tired of hearing that word," Axel said, rubbing the back of his head. "'We're Nobodies, we don't feel. We only have memories of what it's like to feel'. Blah blah blah. You guys already know where I think Xemnas can shove his philosophical crap. And who is he to set the standard that we all feel by? Especially since he's actually one of the most emotional here!"

"Wow Ax, you _feel _that deeply about it, huh?" Roxas teased him, nudging him with an elbow.

"Yep, and damned be any man, woman, or _nobody _that tries to correct me, got it memorized?"

Both of the children laughed at him, but then Xion remembered she had an ugly request to make. "Hey Axel…I know you're going to hate me for this, but…I kind of have a favor I'd like to ask."

Axel looked at her with shining green eyes, still caught up in this joyful moment. "Sure, Xion. You're my friend. Friends do anything they can for each other."

"Um, not so sure about that…but you see, on a mission about a week or so back, I…kind of made a deal with Larxene."

At the sound of her name, Axel's smile faded completely. She might as well have said she'd made a deal with the devil. "Okay. Xion…please tell me this deal isn't worth it."

The girl lowered her head shamefully. "It kind of is to me. She…" She gave a heavy sigh, leaning back on the ledge and staring at the sky, not wanting to meet his face. "She knows I like Riku. And she said she'd get him on a date with me if I got you on a date with her. And…I agreed."

The tower was silent for a moment until: "You sold me out for _that?! _A damn date with a boy you could very well ask out yourself?"

"I'm not good with boys!" Xion cried in her defense. "And if I were seen around him at all, Vexen would throw one of his hissy fits. If Larxene is around him, nobody will think anything of it except that she's probably torturing him. Please, Axel? It's just one date. You don't have to kiss her or anything like that. And besides, I thought friends did anything they could for each other?" She finished with a pout on her lips and her hands on her sides.

"Yeah, but Larxene…wow, Xion. That's a lot to ask. I mean, I'd rather date…Roxas than her!"

The blonde loudly spluttered on his ice cream. "What?!"

"Haha, just kidding, Roxy," Axel said, slapping him hard on the back. "No but seriously…that's just how bad she is."

"It's just one date, Axel," Xion begged. "Pleeeeeeease?"

He rubbed the back of his head again, not able to meet her eyes for a moment. "Fine. But I really ought to make you owe me something for this…"

"Oh, thank you a million times over, Axel!" She said. Had she been closer to him on the ledge rather than on Roxas' other side, she would've glomped him. Be it as it was, she only flashed him a smile bright enough to blind him.

"Yeah, yeah, but just think twice before you accept deals next time, got it memorized?"

All three of them laughed, although Axel wasn't feeling so carefree anymore…

- - -

It took everything in Xion to keep from running back to Larxene's room when she returned to the castle. She knocked cautiously on her door, not wanting to be disrespectful so as to upset the woman.

"Enter," Larxene said on the other side.

Inside the room, Larxene was surprisingly reading. Usually, the only person in the Org that would be seen with a book was Zexion. Even Vexen would carry around more test tubes than literature.

"Hey, I got you that date with Axel," Xion said after she'd closed the door behind her. "I'll admit, he was reluctant about it, but at least he's willing to give it a try. Soo…" She trailed off.

Larxene flipped the book closed and put it away inside her bedside cabinet, but not before she saw the cover of it. It was some sort of sappy romance book, and that's when it struck Xion that despite Larxene's cold exterior, she was still an ordinary woman on the inside. She could care and wanted to be cared for as well. She loved like anyone else. Maybe there was more to her than she'd thought.

"You want to know about Riku, I'm guessing," Larxene said, interrupting her musings. "Well, I asked him."

"And what'd he say?" She wanted to shake the answer out of her, how anxious she was.

"He said no." She told her, picking up a remote and turning on the TV carelessly.

"Wha--? But…you said…"

"I said I'd try. I never said I'd guarantee anything." She flipped through several channels before settling on a horror movie. "I guess your darling Riku doesn't like you." Here she gave her usual cold smile with the mocking eyes. "But I thank you for getting me Axel. You can go now." She shooed her away with a hand, turning back to the TV.

If she hadn't seen it before, it was clear to Xion now why Axel would rather date an underage boy than this woman here. She wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing how hurt she was, but the moment she left out the room, she broke into a run and headed for her own room.

Vexen happened to be coming out of his lab at the same time. "Make sure you don't let the contents over boil this time, Zexion. You haven't exactly been focused here lately. Lord only knows what's been going through your mind," he called to his assistant. Just as he was about to walk down the hall, Xion ran past him. He didn't miss the tears streaming down her face.

_Hm, now what has her so disconcerted? _He didn't even bother to run after her, but took the quicker approach and just warped into her room. He was there when she ran in, slamming the door behind her and throwing herself on the bed. She clutched a pillow to herself and sobbed.

This was the first time he'd ever willingly tried to show some other emotion besides his cold tactical side and he knew he was likely to fudge up this attempt at bonding. Nevertheless, he walked over to the bed and sat down on it, not quite looking at the girl.

"So…you seem quite upset…" Ugh, he was stating the obvious. And it wasn't like it was something that could warrant a response either, so he wasn't surprised when Xion just continued crying.

_Maybe I went a bit far when I proclaimed to be her father, _he thought. _Besides, she is just a replica. Another subject of mine. And—that's it! See this as a mystery that needs to be solved, an equation that needs the missing pieces filled in. _

He took a deep breath and tried again. "What is bothering you Xion? It's not like you to be like this, not if the feisty attitude I usually see is anything to go by."

She sniffled. "Go away. I definitely don't want to talk to _you._"

Vexen would be lying if he said that didn't hurt him. "Perhaps not, but I'm the only one here at the moment, you evidently have something on your mind and I'm not likely to blab whatever you tell me to anyone else. I think I make quite the perfect candidate to tell out your woes to."

She leveled him with puffy eyes. "You? Ha. Why, because you're my _father_?"

"Do I need a better reason?" He asked her.

She was actually taken back by this. "Oh. Well…you wouldn't understand it anyways," She said, turning away from him.

He shrugged. "Wouldn't know unless you actually told me. As you yourself never hesitate to point out, I'm quite old. But that also means I've lived long enough to see and experience quite a bit of life. So, try me."

"Relationship issues," Xion said simply.

Vexen blanched. "Er…I married science a long time ago. She's never cheated on me, doesn't bicker, and in turn, I have stayed faithful to her."

"Yeah, and I'm the love child produced from that relationship," Xion muttered dryly. "Well, you just helped prove my point there. You wouldn't know anything about my problem. You found science and never looked back."

Vexen wasn't about to tell her his own unsuccessful attempts at romance, mainly because at his age, that would probably be quite disturbing. "Again, I still dare you to try me," he said, hoping she'd take the bait.

"Alright, since you really want to know," Xion said. She sat up, still holding the pillow. "Remember our last mission that you, I, Larxene and Riku had together? Larxene found out I…that I like Riku," she said quietly, looking off to the side. "So she made a deal with me. She'd ask Riku to go out with me, if I got her Axel. Well, Axel actually agreed, but…but Riku said no to me," she whispered.

Vexen pursed his lips as he thought this over. He could feel something churning inside him and when he sorted through the memories of his emotions, he found he was angry. He thought things over for a moment while Xion went back to her crying.

"Xion…Did you ever think to ask Riku yourself?" Oh no…what was he doing?!

She gave a loud sniffle. "What's the point? Just so I can be rejected right to my face?"

"Are you really going to just take Larxene's word at face value for being true?" Gods, what was he saying?! Was he helping her out?!!

"Well…I mean, I guess…"

"Please dear, I constructed you with the ability to deduct things on your own, so utilize that. You have an inner scientist within you too, one that likes to get to the heart of the matter, so to speak. As the popular phrase within the field goes, seek a second opinion. Larxene isn't known for spreading truths, so it would make sense to ask Riku yourself. If he says no, then it'll be nothing new. But if he says yes…well then, there you go."

This time, Xion wiped her eyes on her sleeves and stared up at him. "Why are you helping me?" she asked suspiciously.

Without thinking about it, he said, "Because I'm your father. Need I any other reason?"

Xion gave a strangled sob and then threw herself at him. It took everything in his power to stop his normal reaction of pushing her away. Instead, he patted her on her back carefully, as though she'd break. "Go to him," he whispered in her ear when they finally pulled away.

The girl nodded and as she disappeared into her dark portal, she mouthed the words 'thank you' back to him.

Before her own hole closed, he cast open his own and quickly disappeared through it. Thankfully, Xion hadn't arrived yet and hopefully wouldn't for a moment, if he could help it. He was in the kitchen, where Xaldin was standing, reading a cookbook as he sprinkled some sort of seasoning into a pot. The Org had come to find out that he was indeed quite a good cook, once he learned not to be over-enthusiastic to outdo others to prove a point. This worked, since Zexion was always with him as they worked on various projects and experiments.

Over at the dining table, Riku was sitting working on a Rubix cube, oblivious to his surroundings since he was also listening to music.

Vexen interrupted his peaceful moment when he snatched him up by the front of his cloak and dragged him back through the portal that was still open. He pushed him violently against a wall, making the headphones fall out of Riku's ears.

"Listen up," Vexen said harshly. "My little Xion will be asking if you like her in a little bit. You had better say yes or you're going to experience a side of me that'll haunt you for the rest of your life. Do you understand me?"

"Dude…chillax. I like Xion fine. I don't know anything about her though, so if she wants to go out, then whatever." Riku was still as calm as ever, although he was wearing a bit of a scowl from the hand gripping his shirt so tightly.

"Good," Vexen said, pushing Riku one more time for emphasis, then let go of him. "Oh, and you better not try any funny business on her either. Keep it G rated!"

Riku gave him a very strange look that basically said, "What decade is your dating advice?!" before he left out of the portal and back into the dining room.

"I'm serious! Touch my little girl and you're going to be an ice statue in a cryogenic pod in my lab!" But Riku was gone by then. Vexen was heading back to his lab when Xion ran up to him again.

"He said yes! He even asked me out this weekend!!" She shouted joyfully, grabbing Vexen's hands while jumping up and down. "Wow, I totally misjudged you, Vexen. I mean…dad." She stopped her jumping, twisting a foot nervously as she stared at the floor.

Vexen didn't really have any words for her, but he patted her back and gave her a smile that he hoped wasn't creepy. Xion nodded, then actually skipped off down the hall, undoubtedly to either Axel or Roxas' room.

He wasn't fully sure what today meant, but he did have to wonder if what he felt would really be strengthened by having a heart. He gave a contented sigh and could only hope so.

* * *

And thus Vexen and Xion's relationship has moved on to a new stage. But there's plenty of comedy to be had with her finally admitting that he's her father, ^_^ Also, I won't focus on Riku and Xion's date…that's actually a sub-plot, if even that. Just something to bring more life to the rest of the Org. But I have, however, already done Larxene's and Axel's! I'll probably post it as a Valentine's Day special or something.

Do the Dew and review!


	15. What's Love Got To Do With It

Happy Valentine's day, folks! Or, er…if you hate it, then, Not-So-Happy Valentine's Day. I'm an unbiased person on the holiday (never had anyone 'special' to celebrate it with, lol!), so, meh, whatever. A day for kickin' back, grabbing whatever candy _I _like, and just piggin' out! Anywho, here's the dreaded date with Larxene. Will Axel survive it? Well gee golly, read and find out!

**

* * *

What's Love Got to Do With It? **

_ Ugh, I can't believe I'm actually doing this, _Axel thought to himself as he looked at his reflection in his full length mirror. It had been ages since he'd worn normal clothes and doing so for _Larxene _made him cringe. It wasn't anything fantastic or nothing, just a simple t-shirt and jeans…but it was _Larxene. _Enough said!

"Axel, are you ready? Hurry up, we're going to miss the start of the movie! And I'll zap your balls if I miss any of it!"

_How eloquent of her, _he narrowed his eyes and frowned. Cologne? He could suffocate her with his buddy Axe, but decided to forget about it. He wasn't going to give her the chance to smell him wearing anything that just might make her like him more than what she sickingly already did.

With that thought, he turned to leave out his room and ran smack dab into an upside down Xigbar. "Good luck buddy. Oh, and I hope the soles of your shoes are rubber."

"Er, why's that?"

"C'mon, everyone knows rubber doesn't conduct electricity!" Here, Xigbar gave him a wink, threw something at him, and then vanished.

Axel didn't even have to look at it to know what it was. The small, flat square was too distinguishable. A condom. _Rubber. Haha, hilarious. _He fried it in his palm before continuing out.

"There you are!" Larxene shouted when he reached her room. She too was thankfully dressed in normal clothes, but her t-shirt had quite the disturbing phrase on it: "Don't go to bed angry; Stay awake and plot your revenge."

_Thanks, Hot Topic, _Axel snorted. "So…ready?"

"Yeah, just about." She added another swipe to her eyeliner, completing the look that made it seem like someone had run a blowtorch around her eyelids. With that, she cast open a portal and stepped through first. Axel said a silent prayer before following after her.

They appeared in Twilight Town, in a back alley to keep anyone from noticing their strange arrival. Thankfully, Larxene wasn't the type that needed to be escorted and simply marched to the theater across the street.

That was as far as she was leading though. At the ticket window, she turned to Axel and smiled. "We're seeing that new horror movie that came out." No, 'please', 'can we', 'I'd really like to', nothing. That was what they were doing.

It beat a chick flick. He paid for two tickets to the movie. A seven dollar ticket. Couldn't she have bought this herself since he was likely to pay for everything else?

After the tickets came the inevitable snacks. Most women nowadays learned to hit up a store before they went to the theaters, stashing cheaper goods in their purse. Thankfully, Larxene knew this trick too, but it was rendered pointless when it came to popcorn. The only way to get it fresh was to get it from the counter and thus Axel was made to buy her this as well.

And oh, she couldn't just get a small or a medium or something, oh goodness no! She had to get the King Kong bucket! And never once asked if she'd be sharing with him! Axel did want some popcorn too, but he didn't want to have to share with her. However, he was hoping for something bigger than the extra small he was forced to buy. This woman was going to break him; he already saw it coming.

The movie was decent. At least what bits he could hear over Larxene's raucous laughter over all the deaths. Quite gruesome too. Okay, maybe it _wasn't _all that good…

"Did you see the way that zombie ripped his fucking head off?!" Larxene screamed directly in his ear, bits of popcorn getting lodged in his canal. "Oh my god, that was EPIC!!"

All Axel could focus on was the popcorn in his ear, covered in Larxene spittle. Ew.

After the movie came ice cream. He didn't have the money to indulge in one for himself, and simply shook his head when the guy at the ice cream stand glanced in his direction. Larxene however was quick to order something, then looked pointedly his way to pay for it!

With a very heavy sigh, he pulled out his wallet and paid for the ice cream, noticing how flat his billfold was becoming. The woman obliviously licked the ice cream as they walked along the street. She had grabbed three globs of sea-salt ice cream, his most favorite flavor. Okay, this was a cruelty beyond reason.

"Axel, we should get our pictures taken," She told him after her ice cream induced rambles died down to a level that he could again pick out what she was saying. She pointed to a booth the size of one that a phone would be in.

_Is it me, or is that thing kinda small? _Axel wondered. It wasn't just him. The moment they got inside it, he realized that there was absolutely no way for the pictures to be taken without them getting close. Sitting next to her in the theater was torture enough, now this?

"Smile, damnit!" She said through clenched teeth, forcing her own smile. "I want to be able to send this to my stupid sister, Tifa. She thinks she has a great man, ha! What kind of name is Cloud? _I _have an Axel!" With that, she snagged him closer just as the flash went off.

She did the classic bunny ears, peace signs, rolling of the eyes, all that lovely junk. Axel's smile was the same in every picture, just enough to look happy, but more than enough to tell that he was dying on the inside.

When she grabbed the strip of photos when they were finished, she thankfully gave a satisfied nod before dragging him off. All around them, happy couples littered the streets. He had never been a fan of Valentine's Day and this year was especially horrible. Why did it seem like everyone was starting to kiss and rub noses now? Couldn't they wait a little later until _after _he was away from Larxzilla?

He was about to steer her into a decent restaurant but she stopped him. "That's where we're eating?" The sneer on her face showed her disproval.

"You don't like the Olive Garden?" he asked. _Dear gods, I don't have the money for anything else! _

She smacked her teeth and rolled her eyes. "It's alright. You know, we're supposed to be having an electric storm tonight…"

Subtle, but effective. Axel wanted to run out in front of the next car that drove by and end his life right then and there. Instead, he forced his legs to keep walking until he could find a place that would suit Miss Highroller's tastes.

"Here we are!" She said, stopping in front of somewhere. She would pick the most expensive place.

"Larx, you need a reservation for here," Axel said. "And they wouldn't even let us in without a suit and gown." _Not to mention, I can't pay for this expensive crap! _He wanted to yell.

She only shrugged and said, "That's their problem, not mine." The moment she got inside, the maître'd attempted to stop them. Larxene put one hand on his collarbone and delivered him a powerful jolt that made him crumble to the floor. Then with a saunter that could belong to only her, she strutted into the dining area and took a seat by the window. "See, their problem, not mine," She said to Axel.

He had to admit, he liked her gall, if nothing else. Except her gall was bankrupting him. He flipped open the menu and about had a heart attack (yeah, he didn't have a heart, but _something _in his chest gave a painful throb). When a waitress asked for their order, he simply said he'd take a glass of water. _Please let that be free…_

"Uh, yeah, I'll take the T-bone steak, bloody…" Larxene ordered. Axel begged her with his eyes to stop.

"You can keep that asparagus mess, but I will take a fully loaded baked potato. And I mean _loaded._"

_Larx, please don't do this to me…_

"For dessert, I'll have a slice of your red velvet cake. Make that two slices."

_Aren't you worried about watching your figure?! Be like other girls for once and be obsessed with it!!_

"And to drink…your finest wine, please," She finished, handing the menu back with a smile.

Axel was extremely close to breaking down into tears.

When the food came, he watched in horror as she devoured all of it. Not a crumb was spared. At least he had that to be thankful for. He wasn't going to be in the back washing dishes to pay for a meal that wasn't thoroughly enjoyed.

When the bill came, he had never wanted to murder the woman across from him more. Oh, and the staff of the restaurant. His little glass of water, his _one _simple glass of water cost him ten munny. He glanced over to Larxene's half and…wasn't too terribly shocked. Eighty munny.

His forty munny would've covered a nice meal at the Olive Garden. And that's all he could think about as the waitress came back to get the check. At least he had his half covered…

"Oh, miss, I think you made a mistake," Larxene said to her.

"Oh goodness, where?" She asked, leaning closer to look at the tab.

"Here," Larxene said with an evil chuckle. Before the woman could move, she grabbed her neck and zapped her. She supported the body to keep it from loudly falling to the floor, slipping her into the seat as she got up. She leaned her body over to make it look like she'd simply fallen asleep.

In the same manner as she had come in, Larxene waltzed out of the place as though nothing had gone amiss.

"Okay, I actually have to hand it to you," Axel said once they were outside. "That was impressive."

"Oh, it's nothing," she shrugged, then giggled. "That exact meal probably would've been at the Olive Garden for much cheaper. I just wanted to shove it in their pompous-ass faces is all."

The clock tower struck out the hour, the sun setting in the distance. "You know, I wouldn't mind going up there," She mused.

_Oh no! _"We should probably head back. It's getting dark…"

It was a lame line and she called him on it. "And Larx said, let there be _light!_" She formed an electrical ball in her hand, smiling at him. Without further ado, she cast open a portal (damned be anyone who saw her) and stepped through it.

Axel didn't have to follow her. No, not to his most favorite spot, of all places. But watching his back from Larxene wasn't a pleasant thought either. Oh, and Marluxia, because since the two were so buddy-buddy, any wrong doing to her was a wrong doing to him and Marlene trouble wasn't something he needed.

With a sigh of regret, he stepped through the portal too. She was already waiting for him on the clock tower ledge, dangling her feet over the side.

She was sitting where Roxas would be.

"Come join me," She said, patting a spot next to her. His usual spot.

"I'm good, Larx. Think I'll just stay here…"

She blinked once. "How about this. Sit next to me for a moment and then we'll call it quits, okay? No more spending up your money, no more shocking people or whatnot. Straight back to the castle, deal?"

There was something nagging at him about her words, but he ignored it and flopped down beside her.

She began leaning over toward him…steadily getting closer…

Ahh, now he knew what it was. Didn't he just tell Xion the other day, in this very spot, to watch what deals she made with Larxene? He told her to get it memorized as well! How could he have forgotten his own advice?

Slowly, her lips were drawing closer to his…

He couldn't believe this spot was being sullied with her presence. He should've known better. Would he be able to come back here with Roxas and Xion and enjoy the time spent there after this?

Her mouth opened, so close to him now…then, she licked.

…what the?!

"How the hell did you get popcorn in your ear?" She asked, chewing on it. She actually hadn't used her tongue to get it, but had wetted a finger, effectively giving Axel a wet-Willy as well.

"I'll explain it on the way back," he told her, his voice lathered in his relief. The sanctity of the meeting place was still intact. He hadn't defiled it and would live to come back another day to enjoy it. With that thought, he cast open a portal behind him and left inside it before she could make him do anything else.

"I actually enjoyed our time, Axel," She said when they were outside her door. "And that's saying something."

He wasn't sure he really wanted that to be a good thing. "Um…yeah…same to you…and stuff."

She suddenly hugged him and he stiffened, figuring this would be where she'd give him the shock treatment, then drag him caveman style into her room. But she let go, gave him a smile that would never resemble anything other than 'cruel bitch', and went inside.

He was free. He'd done it!!!!! He took the time to do a dance right then and there, not caring who saw him.

…Such as Lexaeus. "I'm…not going to ask…" The man said, shaking his head and continuing on his way.

Axel teleported to his room, still giddy with relief. He was in the midst of doing more jigs when Xigbar popped in. "Got lucky tonight, eh?"

"You could say that, yes," Axel said.

Xigbar blinked at him. "Huh. Well then. Good for ya!" He clapped him on the shoulder, the poofed again.

Axel didn't give a damn if he misinterpreted what he meant. He'd done the unthinkable tonight. But there was another reason he was proud of himself. By going along with the date, he'd saved Xion some inevitable hell. And that, in truth, is what he was really proud of. Taking a bullet for a friend.

The agony that she'd just put him through though caused him to dream of the simple days back when it was just he and Roxas up on the tower. It wasn't quite fitting, but one line was prominent in his thoughts: Bros before hoes.

He'd have to get that memorized.

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Can we get a chay for subtle akuroku hints? I'll always love those two, ^_~

Please review!


	16. Snips, Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

Whoo, longest chapter yet! But I think I finally answered the requests for the appearance of certain characters, plus threw in a few ideas that have been rumbling around in my silly imagination for the longest. In fact, everyone makes an appearance here…Which is probably why it's so long. Anywho, enjoy it.

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Snips, Snails and Puppy Dog Tails**

Now that everything was on a roll, days off at the Org were few and far between. So when Xemnas announced that morning that he had nothing for anyone to do that day, you can imagine the relief that washed through the members.

Most of everyone headed back to bed, since sleeping in was also rare. Others branched off to hang out or just relax. It was at this point that Marluxia found himself in the presence of the half-starved Namine.

"Mind if I do your hair?" She asked, smiling.

"Mind if I do yours?" He asked back.

It would suffice to say that she was pretty shocked. "Um…I guess…I mean, if that's your thing…" And here she gave him this uncertain look that clearly showed her unease.

"Fret not, child. Did you think I was born with hair like flower petals? Like a new bud, I had to grow and blossom, study and learn the techniques of beauty. You are in capable hands, dear, I won't butcher you." For once, his smile was genuine.

"I…I guess…" She took his hand and he led her to his room (don't get any wrong ideas!). He sat her down in a chair and after cracking his fingers, he got to work.

Demyx was bored. He'd been playing his sitar quite a bit lately and now he was ready to do something else. He wasn't sure what, nor did he care what. Anything was better than playing Owl City's _Vanilla Twilight _for another million times.

He walked around the castle, heading in no particular direction. It wasn't until he stopped and looked around that he realized he was outside of Vexen's upper level lab. He listened at the door to see if anyone was inside and didn't hear anything. Gently he pushed it open, careful to still be quiet.

Sadly, that did nothing for his slight clumsiness. He tripped over…well, nothing, and landed against a table, rattling the beakers sitting on it.

That was when he realized that the room actually wasn't empty. Zexion was sitting at the back, and had been reading until the noise startled him. When he jumped, the book flew into the air, but something else did as well. A magazine. And the woman on the cover was nearly as nude as the day she was born.

"Number Nine! What are you doing in here?" He asked, trying to hurry up and hide the magazine.

"Wow, Zexion…I mean, hey, it's your business and all, but…never knew you were the type to look at that stuff." Demyx couldn't hold back a snicker.

"Quiet! Somebody thought it'd be funny to toss this into my room! I was just…um…making sure some strange message for me wasn't hidden in it or something!"

Demyx blinked. "You know, I think Pinocchio could come up with a better lie than that and not have his nose grow longer. Besides, if that was the case, mind explaining why you were reading it behind a normal book?"

Zexion blanched for a second, then composed himself. When he looked back up, he was staring daggers at him. A moment later, the room changed and they were standing on a large cliff overlooking a gorge. Zexion was now in front of Demyx, holding him by his cloak and over the edge.

"Speak a word to anyone about this and I'll drop you and leave you there. Yes, it's an illusion, but _you _won't know how to get out."

"It's as I said, your business," Demyx told him again, trying to get him to release his shirt.

Zexion changed the room back to the lab and let go of him, muttering something about a 'car wash' as he walked away.

Demyx didn't care too much for staying in that room anymore and warped to a random hall. If nothing else, the castle left a lot of places to explore and so again, he walked around until he came to a floor he hadn't been on before.

The rooms were not in numeric order, since each member took whatever room they had wanted. Without looking at the name on one of the doors, he creaked it open. It was dark inside, the occupant probably out enjoying the vacation.

Without thinking about it, Demyx threw on the lights. And before he could run, yell, _blink, _he was being attacked by something quite heavy.

He flailed his arms like a madman, but the object remained on him. At the very least, he could look at what was about to kill him. He peaked open an eye and of all things, saw Saix.

"Er…Number Seven?"

"Woof!"

"Are you feeling okay Saix?"

Saix wagged his bottom as though he had a tail.

_What the hell did Zexion do to me?! _Was the only explanation for this that Demyx could come up with.

Saix leaned down and rubbed his face against his, then licked him, barking and wagging his tailless bottom again.

"You're acting like a dog," Nine murmured. "I mean, I know Superior calls you Saix-papi and stuff, but this is a whole new level. Maybe you only do it every now and then." He found himself reaching up and scratching him behind his ears, and Saix responded by thumping his foot on the ground.

"Well then, I guess you're my buddy for the day," Demyx declared. "Puppies need plenty of exercise, so let's go get some!"

"Woof! Woof!"

He opened a portal and came out into the castle's personal gym. No telling whose idea it was to put one in, but Lexaeus and Xaldin were there already, one lifting weights, the other spotting. They gave quizzical looks to Demyx when they saw him, but Xaldin about dropped the weight on his chest when he saw Saix, on all fours, walk into the room as well.

"Did you learn hypnosis or something?" Lexaeus had to ask.

"Nope! Saix is having a rare dog day so, I'm going to keep him company!" Demyx grinned. He picked a thin rope off of the floor and tied it to the metal chain on the front of Saix's jacket. Then he guided him to the treadmill, set it to a low speed, and let the 'dog' go.

He himself took one right next to it. Saix was keeping pace on it very easily, lolling his tongue at the blonde and occasionally 'wagging'.

"You're doing excellent, puppy! Here, let me let you run for a little bit." He reached over and upped the setting. It was quite strange to see a human running at those speeds on all fours, but Saix managed somehow.

But Saix didn't have the stamina of a dog. After only a few minutes, his breath was coming fast and he was falling behind on the treadmill. Demyx didn't notice him struggling until it was too late. The rope on his jacket was pulled taught and eventually started raising the coat above his head. It got tangled on his arms (legs for a dog) and he tripped up.

"Puppy, no!" Demyx screamed and tried to turn the machine off. The rope on the jacket snapped and in a tangled mess, Saix was thrown off of it and against the back wall. He splatted, then slowly slid down to the floor.

"Saix-puppy, are you okay?!" Demyx asked, tears welling up in his eyes as he tried to sort out the mass of blue, black and flesh. Finally, he pulled the jacket over his head and discarded it. Saix was whimpering like a true puppy, curled into a ball and nursing a nail.

Yes, a nail.

"Puppy, you're hurt! Don't worry, Vexen'll help you!" He grabbed the 'dog' and warped to the infirmary. Vexen was there, looking over some charts. "Vexen, you have to help him! He hurt himself while we were exercising."

Vexen gave an exasperated sigh from being pulled away from his work and looked up at one of his least favorite members. He then looked at the other person with him and about died from shock. "Good Kingdom Hearts! Why does he look like that?!"

"He hurt himself on the treadmill. Please, Vexen, you have to help Saix-puppy! He needs you! And…I need him!" Demyx burst into tears, sobbing on Saix's shoulder.

"Nine, I have no idea what the hell you're talking about. If you're confused that that's a dog, then you're at the wrong place. I have an M.D. not a V.M.D."

"Vexy!!!" Demyx pleaded his loudest yet. The nickname took Vexen off guard.

"It's Four or Vexen to you!" He snarled. But he pushed the boy aside and looked over Saix. "Seems like he's alright. A broken nail, but no other injuries as far as I can see. He's fine." He put a band-aid on his finger, decorated with the Power Rangers.

"Oh thanks, I heart you Vexen!" Demyx squealed, trying to give him a hug. He flinched back and instead, Demyx settled for giving a huge hug to Saix, who barked and licked his face some more.

"And for your sake, you might want to find the person responsible for putting that spell on him, lest your dragging him around results in you being on the list of people he's going to kill when he turns back," Vexen advised. "Oh, and if he asks, I didn't see this." With that, he pushed both of them out the room.

"Let's go see what some of the others are up to," Demyx told his new friend. Saix trotted along beside him. They came to Marluxia's room, and he nudged open the door, since it was already cracked.

First thing they saw was Namine in a chair. Then they saw _Marluxia _doing her hair. He was in the middle of curling it and was pleasantly chatting with the girl.

"We're just making sure that your bangs frame your face, because that bright blonde will make those baby blues of your eyes pop. After this, I'll touch you up with a tad of make-up, nothing too heavy though because then your milkshake will bring all the boys to the yard. And finally, we'll end with a small shopping expedition. With Xemnas forgetting about you every three seconds, I'm sure you could use a day out."

Finally, he seemed to notice he was being watched and looked up to see a wide-eyed Demyx and a shirtless Saix, who was…sitting on his haunches. "Er, did you have an appointment with me?" he asked.

"Um…I wasn't even aware that appointments could be made…" Demyx mumbled, looking at Namine and her fluffed hair. "You're a stylist?"

"Don't ask stupid questions, Derek," Marluxia scoffed. "I'm not a stylist; I'm an artist."

He didn't miss the sardonic look the blonde gave him.

"Fine! Take you and your mutt and leave!" Marluxia snapped.

Saix began growling at him, but Demyx snapped his fingers to get his attention and pulled him away. "Looks like nobody really wants you around, pup. How about I play _Vanilla Twilight _for you?"

As per usual, Saix wagged and followed him to his room. He crawled on the bed on all fours, walked around in a circle above one of his pillows, then flopped down on it, snuggling to get comfortable. Demyx tuned his sitar, and in a pitch a bit above the real song, he began to play.

_The stars lean down to kiss you, and I lie awake and miss you. Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere_—

His singing was cut off by loud bass bumping in the next room over. Coincidently, he happened to have his room in numeric order so that he was between Axel, number eight, and Luxord, number ten. Axel's room was quiet, it seemed. Then again, Axel would sleep until the cows came home if he were left alone long enough. That's probably what he was doing.

The music was coming from Luxord's room, which was quite noisy regardless of that. Must've been a lot of people in there. "I'm sure Luxy won't reject you puppy," Demyx told Saix.

They entered via portal and about landed on Axel as he sat on a small couch in the room. "Whoa, what the hell?! There's a front door, maybe you should use it next time, got it memorized?"

"Whoops, sorry Ax," Demyx apologized and instead moved over to just sit beside him. Saix sat faithfully at his heels. "Soo…what's going on here?"

Axel chuckled. "Roxas is getting his ass handed to him in poker by Luxord," he laughed.

Demyx looked over at the card table and sure enough, Roxas was down to wearing just his pants and underwear, his coat, gloves, boots and even socks gone. Larxene was strangely in the room too, sipping on a wine cooler as she watched on, smart not to get involved with the game. Demyx couldn't quite understand what part Riku was playing either, until he saw him standing next to Xion as she put another disc in the CD player. Ahh…she was the DJ with him being used for a second opinion. Or just keeping him close since those two were 'going steady.'

Xigbar was hanging upside down, also playing with the others. Such a position had to offer him a bit of a cheat, but he played it off nicely, having supposedly lost a single glove and boot.

"A whole party and nobody called me," Demyx whispered to Saix, who frowned and then growled at the host, Luxord. He then sniffed at a cooler beside the couch, a small fridge. Demyx opened it and threw a hotdog to Saix, who snapped it up in two bites. He himself took a soda.

"Demyx, what's wrong with Saix anyways? Why is he sitting like that? Did he hurt his legs?" Xion asked him.

"No…he doesn't do this often, does he?" He asked, pointing the question to Axel since he'd known him longer.

"Saix wouldn't act like a dog for all the money in the world," he said. "And when he wakes up, you better hope you're no where near him because he's definitely going to go berserk."

"Vexen told me the same thing…"

"Vexen's a smart one then," Axel said, turning back to the poker game.

Roxas by that point had had enough. "I QUIT! Take my damn belt because I'm not stripping below the waist! And keep my damn munny! I only wanted to buy a birthday gift for Axel, but screw it! I guess I'll just make him a card from my printer, completely cheap and stuff! No, don't worry! It's JUST FINE!" He was seething.

"I guess you like taking money from little kids, don't you Luxord? Just rob 'em, don't give a damn! And…Xion. Of all the songs you have, you had to play _that one_?"

"It was fitting," she giggled. "And Riku agreed."

"One, Riku, I hate you. Two, Xion, please. Change it. If I hear anything about this game, I think I'm going to lose it," He gritted.

"Too late! Larxene is already dancing to it. And what kind of DJ would I be to change a song the crowd loves?"

"Screw the DJ, I lost munny!" Roxas shouted.

But it really was too late. Axel wasn't dancing with Larxene, but he was dancing. Xigbar, however, was. Xion put down her book of CD's and joined them, pulling Riku with her, then Luxord and Demyx (Saix growling at his side at whoever came close to him).

And since Roxas couldn't beat them, he was left to join them. In that tiny little room, they all danced to the most fitting song of the occasion, _Poker Face, _by Lady Gaga.

The music was turned up impossibly louder, rocking the walls but nobody cared. That is, until the door opened.

"WOULD YOU PEOPLE PLEASE TURN THAT…What the hell is going on here?!!" Xemnas interrupted them. "Dear gods, this even looks like a Lady Gaga video!"

And indeed it did. What with Luxord having unzipped part of his jacket and Xigbar doing the same, they enclosed Larxene (who was just trying to capture Axel's eye). Axel and Xion were dancing on the couch, Xion swinging her hair and Axel wagging his butt in some sort of jig. Riku was in front of Xion on the floor, doing some motion that looked…like he was spanking…er…yeah. Demyx danced to himself, although perhaps it could be seen that he was dancing with Saix. And Roxas…Roxas was the deal breaker. He was still nude down to his pants, swinging his coat over his head as he let loose with the music.

Customary to many of Lady Gaga's videos, it looked like they were having some sort of orgy.

"Okay. I see vacation days are going to have to be to a minimum," Xemnas said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Ordinarily, I would join you, but I have a reputation to keep." Nobody mentioned that no, he didn't, but whatever. "Please get dressed all of you." He walked into the room and grabbed Saix' arm, who growled and bit him.

"Ouch! Saix, what's gotten into you?" Saix only growled some more. "You're acting like a...AH! You really are my Saix-papi!!!" Here, he forgot all his composure (see, told you he didn't have a reputation to keep) and hugged him close to him. "Who's my wittle Saix-papi!"

Demyx stepped away to go get another soda across the room. The Saix in Xemnas' arms blinked, then looked around him. "Superior, is something wrong?" He asked.

Everyone took a collective gasp.

"Saix…I…didn't you go into a dog form just a moment ago?" Xemnas asked him.

"Superior, I have no idea what you're talking about," Saix said, standing up on two legs finally. "Ow, my head hurts. Did I hit it or something? What happened to my nail? And where are my clothes?!" He spotted Roxas still holding his jacket and snatched it up, shoving his much-too-big body into it.

"Hey! You owe me a cloak!" Roxas shouted.

"And you owe me a shut the fuck up!" Saix told him. "Alright, I want some answers and I want them now! Did somebody drug me?" The he gasped as well. "Oh no…was I…was I raped?! I don't remember anything from after I went back to bed this morning."

He looked around the room, trying to find someone that was likely to do it. His only conclusion: Xemnas.

"Whoa, it wasn't me! I just got here!" Xemnas shouted.

"Why were you even _touching _me!" Saix started shouting. "I don't _like _to be _touched._"

Xemnas looked like he was about to answer, paused, and pulled a complete fast one by vanishing on the spot.

The others looked at one another for about two seconds before also running for it. Saix let out a ferocious howl and conjured his claymore.

As he went on the warpath, Vexen could only shake his head from his basement lab. "I told them they should leave him alone. But does anyone listen to the scientist? Noooo."

Marluxia patted Namine's finished hair, as he stood holding open the door for her to leave. "Come back again in a few days for a touch up," he said. Just then, A white and black blur flew by the door, running at top speeds and screaming very loudly. Right behind it was a blue and black blur, growling very loudly. And behind that was a blonde and black blur, shouting something about a puppy.

"Er, on second thought, maybe you should just stay here for a bit…" Marluxia said. "_Where The Wild Things Are _has come to The Castle That Never Was."

Thus he and the girl waited for the pandemonium outside to die down, entertaining her with a much nicer card game of gold fish.

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Heh-heh…I've wanted to throw a dance scene to Poker Face in here for the longest, lol! As for why I mentioned Vanilla Twilight, I have my Owl City-obsessed friend to thank for that. He has been crazy about that song since he got the CD for Christmas. Anywho, I don't own either of those songs, and all that jazz.

Points to whoever can tell me what popular YouTube abridger I copied when Roxas said, "Screw the DJ, I lost munny!"

Please review!


	17. Masterless and Free

Some of you might seriously hate me for this. This is actually the last chapter. I never intended for it to be, but I have nothing much to really add to it and I have another KH story in mind (whoops, promised I'd get back to Death Note after this, lol!). I had actually meant to put in the FF characters that were in the games in here as well, but they're in my next story, so it's alright. ^_^

Again, forgive me for suddenly springing this ending on you. This chapter actually shatters a few of the backstories I created and instead follows canon to the video games, but I think you guys will be able to keep up. Regardless hope you enjoy it.

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Masterless and Free**

If last week's craziness had taught Saix anything, it was that Demyx could be hazardous to him. His strange dog transformation only occurred when in Nine's vicinity. Or…maybe other special circumstances were needed as well? Regardless, he took care now to stay away from him.

Granted, the meetings forced him to have to sit next to the young man anyways. Xemnas had just called everyone to order. Thankfully, sometime ago, he had dropped his stupid 'brotherly bonding Monday' idea, meaning today was about business. Then again, with Xemnas, you could never tell if what he was going to say was really important or just important to _him. _

"It gives me great pleasure to announce that Kingdom Hearts is now over halfway complete," The man was telling them. "You all are doing an excellent job. And Roxas' Other is as well, what with the heartless infestations he's been having to control, thus giving us even more hearts."

Roxas gave a very audible huff and muttered, "Frickin' showoff."

Xemnas continued. "Our old master Ansem once did not want us to continue our exploration of the heart…but now, we are very close to going beyond any research he was ever willing to conduct. We can cast away the pathetic bodies of our own Others and—"

"Wait a moment," Luxord suddenly spoke up. His eyes were slightly bleary, working off yet another hangover. "Did you say Ansem? The guy that everyone calls Ansem the Wise?"

"Yes…wasn't aware you had heard of him," Xemnas said. "Did you too study under him?"

"Xiggy, let me steal your line for a moment. As if!" Luxord told him. "That's my father."

The room went still.

Luxord seemed to be struggling with something in his mind, until whatever it was dawned on him.

"It was you people!!! You're the ones that wrecked his lab! Do you know how much you financially fucked us over?! Do you know how distraught he was after all the hard work he put into his research all for his assistants to pull a B&E (read: breaking and entering) on him?! He actually had to be put in a mental hospital! And now he's a crabby ass old man with a split personality named Diz and spends his time yelling at kids to stay off his lawn and creating horrible inventions like an electroshock potato! _You _people did this to him!"

Everyone starred daggers at Xemnas. "Oh don't you all look at me like that! Half of you were right there with me! Vexen and Zexion, you told me exactly where everything was! Lexaeus, you put the man in a sleeper hold! Xigbar, you shot him for good measure! The rest of you helped loot the lab and Axel, you looted Ansem himself for his valuables! Don't act like I'm the only bad guy here!"

"Opps, heh-heh…" Axel chuckled. He slipped off a very nice watch from his wrist and tossed it to Luxord. "I was just, um…keeping it safe."

The blonde shook his head. "I think I need another drink. Or maybe I should send all of you to the prehistoric ages and just leave you there."

"Well then, Luxord, please tell your father we send our deepest apologies," Xemnas said, going into his deep, dramatic voice. "I'll be sending along an edible flower fruit arrangement as well."

Luxord gave an incredulous splutter, but said nothing else.

"Alright then, meeting adjourned," Xemnas told them. As always, he vanished first.

As Riku was leaving the room, he saw an unfamiliar figure walk by the door. It wasn't until he had done a double take that he recognized the person…as him! But it was a younger version. And the clothes…it was the side of him that was wrestling with darkness some years ago. Man, he was scrawny back then!

"Whoa, mini me," he whispered. The boy stopped in front of him, sneering.

"I am nothing like you. I have embraced the darkness in my heart. I am more powerful than you because of it. Namine gave me this good luck charm to protect her and I will because I'm—"

"No I didn't!" Namine said, suddenly beside them. She looked at the paopu fruit chain the young boy was holding out. "I've never seen that thing in my life. And I've never seen _you _in my life either! Where the heck did you come up with all of this?"

"Sorry, that would be me," Vexen told them. Turning to the boy he said, "Repliku, you weren't supposed to come out of the basement. You're never to be topside. Now, go back to your room."

"But Dad!" The boy cried out. "I can make you proud! I promise! Just let me defeat this weakling and you'll see!"

The older Riku put a hand to his temple and started rubbing it. "Okay, real quick. Why did you create a replica of me, of all people? And what is his real purpose?"

Vexen sighed. "Forgive me Riku, but long before you joined the Organization, I was conducting experiments on those close to your little Keyblade wielder's friends. That's how Xion came about, through him, and how Repliku came about, through you. I was continuing Ansem's work long before Xemnas decided to get together this group, but no matter. It all worked out in the end, except I found I didn't need Repliku. I haven't the heart (ha ha!) to destroy him, so I'm just keeping him in the basement."

Xion came into the group as well. "So…that means…I have a brother?" She looked at the other boy."Er…Riku and I are…um, ya' know…dating. And this is my brother…AUGH! I'm dating my brother!!!!"

Xemnas chose that moment to appear beside them. "You know, Namine is also a Nobody. That redhead girl's' Nobody…the one from your island, Riku. I never bothered to remember her name, seeing as she had this way of doing this gigglesnort thing, especially when she was younger. Anyways, since Xion is made from her as well, that means she and Namine are sisters, in a way."

Xion looked over at Namine, who smiled brightly. She herself though fainted over, complete system overload. _This does not compute. _

She at least managed to wake up in time for dinner (why everyone ate around the dinner table like a family was beyond her). She walked into the dining room to find that her spot had evidently been moved to in between the Riku replica and Namine. Grudgingly, she flopped into her seat.

"Hey Dad, tell me that story about the birds and the bees again. That was really interesting," Repliku said.

Everyone at the table choked on their food.

"Um…another time, son," he muttered, refusing to look him in the eye.

"Sooo…are you my dad as well?" Namine asked. Her question seemed innocent, but her slightly wrinkled nose said it for her. She was repulsed by the idea of him being her father.

"No, I didn't create you Namine. Your 'parents' would probably be Kairi and Sora…which is awkward considering they're the same age as you. As for why Xemnas says you're his niece, if I were you child, I'd just embrace that more sensible side of the family and not argue about it."

"I'm happy _someone _also thinks all of this is a bit crazy as hell," Xion remarked.

"Watch your language, young lady!" Vexen told her.

"Bite me!" She snarled.

"Don't make me spank you!"

"I'll scream that you're abusing me!"

"I'll send you back to Sora's memories!"

Repliku put a hand on Xion's. "Don't anger Daddy. He's a little rough around the edges, but once you get to know him, he's a really nice guy."

She had to still the hand that wanted to sock this boy in the face for his blind devotion.

In the middle of the meal, a loud crash was heard out on one of the balconies. Everyone froze as they could hear a voice muttering to itself before heavy footsteps sounded above them.

"Um…none of you invited a guest, did you?" Xemnas asked. The others shook their heads no.

"Shall we check it out, Superior?" Saix asked, looking irritated to have his meal interrupted.

"Uhh…I say we should send, um…Lexaeus!" Xemnas said. "Yes, Lexaeus and Larxene, could you go check it out?"

Larxene made no attempt to hide her dislike of the other man. "Ew, could you have paired me with a bigger ox?" She whispered heatedly as she stormed out.

"Did I have to get stuck with the hateful bitch?" Lexaeus muttered, following her.

"Aww, they'll work out their differences," Xemnas smiled unconvincingly.

Out in the hallway, the other two turned to each other. "I say we should just teleport up there, zap whoever it is, and then just chuck them off the ledge. Whoever's breaking in evidently doesn't know what the hell they're doing and shouldn't be allowed to live," Larxene stated.

"Are you saying that incompetency is justifiable for death?" Lexaeus asked.

She rolled her eyes and continued walking. "Look, killing the bastard would just save us time. Or we could torture whoever it is. I REALLY wouldn't mind that!"

"Oh yes, I'm quite sure you wouldn't…"

The balcony above the dining room was situated on a walkway on the outside of the castle. There, they saw a figure wrapped up in robes, getting up from a fall. Several potted plants that had been sitting on the terrace were broken, dirt spread everywhere. The person slowly got up, grumbling more obscenities to their self.

"Damn Nobodies…how senseless to plant _anything_. And in a world devoid of sunlight at that! Now let's see here…" He picked up a device of some sort and began to set it up.

"On three, we attack," Larxene whispered from where they stood out of sight around a corner.

"No…something about him seems familiar…" Lexaeus said, holding up a hand to stay her. He crept closer to the figure.

"You jackass! That's how people in the movies always get killed! This person isn't who you once thought they were, so you don't have to feel any shame about killing them!" She hissed back.

He wasn't listening. Quietly, he drew closer until he stood less than a few yards away.

The other person seemed to sense his presence and whipped around at him. "My goodness. Aeleaus?!"

"Master Ansem?!"

"You back-stabbing bastard!!!" The old man shouted. He tried to fling himself at the man, but tripped over his ropes and fell flat on his face again. Lexaeus decided to take that time to retreat. He cast open a portal for both he and Larxene, fleeing the scene.

"Your old fart of a teacher is here," was the first thing Larxene said when she entered back into the dining room. Collectively, silverware was dropped in surprise.

"Wait…my father…is _here_?!" Luxord asked.

"If that old guy that was their teacher is really your father, then yeah."

Lexaeus threw her a reproachful glare. "Have more respect for Ansem the Wise."

"HA! You guys didn't when you ransacked him! His own pupils! Why should I?"

"Hm…good point…"

"Alright, so what do we do about this?" Zexion asked.

Xemnas sighed. "I guess we have no choice but to confront him." He got up from his seat and led the way through another portal out onto the balcony.

Ansem was still setting up his tripod device, leaning part of it over the side. "Adjust the transmorgifier…calibrate the photoneurons…render the plutonium cells…"

"Hello, Master," Xemnas greeted him.

The man spun around quickly, clearly seething. "Hello, _Xehanort. _How's your little group of _nobodies _coming along?"

"Oh, we're holding up. Say, can't help but notice that big laser looking thing you have there. Mind explaining what you're about to do?"

Ansem gave a harsh laugh. "I'm getting rid of that damn thing up there! No Kingdom Hearts, no hearts for any of you!"

"Dad, please, think of me before you do this!" Luxord spoke up.

"You're nothing but a drunk that helped to sink me deeper into debt!" The man yelled.

Luxord gasped, clearly hurt. "You cut me deep, father. You cut me real deep."

"Oh, I hurt your _feelings_, did I? You're a Nobody, in more ways than one. You have no feelings. Nor do you even have the right to _be._"

Roxas, who was pretty lost to all of this, turned to Axel. "He really _is _bitter, huh? Looks like you guys chose the wrong one to piss off."

Axel flushed in shame for a moment, then shook his head. "Hush, Roxas, this is grown-folks business."

Roxas kicked him in his shin, then stepped forward. "Sir, do forgive them for what they did. They were only doing it in the name of science. You as a scientist should understand this. Besides, they're the ones that lost their hearts, all you lost was—"

"My money, my laboratory, my credibility!" Ansem spat. "I'm destroying this damn thing and then I'll forever be rid of you all!"

"Nobodies don't die though!" Namine spoke up. "We disappear into the darkness, but we're not dead."

Everyone did a double take at her. "How the heck do you know?" Repliku asked.

"I…I just feel it," She said, nodding as though it made sense.

"I'm not seeing the scientific reasoning to back that up…" Saix said. He walked up to the device Ansem had and kicked it over. Instead, it suddenly turned on and shot out at the moon.

"WAY TO GO, SAIX!!!" Everyone shouted at him.

"WHO WANTS A CLAYMORE TO THE FACE?!!!" He shouted back. They all flinched in fear.

The device began to violently shake and he too backed up. "Yes, collect the hearts so that they may be returned to their rightful owners!" Ansem encouraged.

But it only began to shake even more. "Hit the dirt!" Xigbar shouted. He was the master of space though and wasted no time in simply disappearing to another location, much quicker than it took to open a portal.

The others were left to save themselves. Luxord put up large blocks of cards, but it was Vexen that surprisingly did most of the work. He cast an ice barrier and as the laser gun finally exploded, he shielded the rest of the group from the explosion and debris that flew everywhere.

When at last the smoke cleared, he smoothly reminded them who the hero was. "Oh yes, all of you would certainly be dead had it not been for me. I think I deserve a higher rank for that."

"Thanks, pops," Xion and Repliku said, clapping him on the shoulder as they walked by. The others acted like he hadn't spoken at all.

Luxord ran to the front before all of them. In the place of the laser was a scrap of a red robe and a large burn mark.

"DADDY, NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Luxord shouted dramatically, falling to his knees. Right on cue, it began to rain.

This didn't seem to be enough for Demyx, who cast his usual spell to quench the rest of the remaining small flames. "Dance, water, dance!"

Luxord caught a giant wave to the back of the head, only saved from being washed away by the bars on the balcony. "Thank you, Demyx…really could've lived without that though."

"Tee-hee," the blonde giggled.

"Did he have to ruin my beloved plants?" Marluxia lamented, holding up a sodden fern. "Does he not know how much hell it is to grow mariju—I mean…marigolds without sunlight?"

"Why not just plant lunar flowers, faggot?" The old man's voice suddenly said. He too had taken cover, farther down the path. "They don't require the sun and make a hell of a lot more sense to grow in a god forsaken world like this."

He didn't wait for Marluxia to answer before turning to Luxord. "Stop that blubbering, boy. I taught you better than that. Now come buy your father a drink. Dealing with you people is raising my blood pressure."

Luxord quickly ran over to his father to open a portal for him. He paused for a moment though upon noticing Kingdom hearts was disintegrating in the sky. "So…what now?"

Xemnas was their leader and called the shots. But he was horror-struck that his beloved moon was gone. "I…can't believe this…Kingdom Hearts…where is my heart?"

Suddenly, one of the hearts landed directly on his head and his body glowed for a moment before dimming.

The same happened to Xaldin, who stood only a few feet away. "Well I'll be damned…" he mused. "I still don't care too much for having emotions though."

Everyone else eagerly awaited for a heart to land on them as well. Roxas was jostled aside just as one was about to come to him, so instead it landed on the ground. He tried to reach down and grab it, but someone stepped on it and it snapped in half.

With trembling fingers, he picked up the pieces and held them before the one that had done it. Axel. "You broke my heart…" he whispered.

"I…I'm sorry, Roxy!" He stammered. He looked around frantically for a moment as though he could find another, then held out the one in his hands. "Here, you can have my heart."

In their bubble of glee, dimly they heard Namine and Xion go "Awwwwwww!!!"

"Okay, this is turning into a total dangle-fest," Ansem muttered. "Let's go, boy. You know what I usually get, a tea and heavy on the rum." After a heart had landed on Luxord, they both disappeared into a portal.

The hearts continued to fall from the sky, giving each member one (and Axel a replacement). Even Xion and Repliku, who weren't really Nobodies, received one.

"So you're just another version of Riku," Xion said to him. "And I'm made from Sora's memories. I guess you're good to go, but what happens to Sora?"

"Well, if you're your own being, I guess…Sora's just going to have to do without remembering his friend," Repliku supplied. "And I'm a real boy now! Not just a replica! So I guess you guys are just going to have to call me Riku as well."

"To hell we are," Riku said. "How about we call you Pip, short for the pipsqueak you are." The two began to argue with themselves, but everyone else was celebrating their newly acquired hearts.

Saix looked over to Xemnas. "Well, our objective was accomplished. I'll admit, I never expected you to do it. In fact…you really didn't do it! But it happened anyways. Maybe I underestimated you."

Xemnas beamed, then gave him a glomping hug. "I can actually _feel, _Saix-puppy!"

"Yeah, so can I, and I'm about two seconds away from losing it if you don't let me go," Saix grumbled.

"Aww, don't be like that! Oh, can we still be roomies?" Xemnas asked hopefully.

"NO!" Saix yelled at him. "It's been hell living with you. And I'm too old to have a roommate."

"Yeah, figured you'd say something like that…which is why I took out a lease for the apartment right next to the other one! Best friends for ever and ever and ever and ever!!!"

Saix couldn't hold it back any longer. Be began to sob right then and there at the prospects of his future.

- - -

The members went their separate ways that day, but occasionally, friends would check in on other friends and members, keeping together the bonds they had formed while in the Organization.

Xemnas went into theater and put his dramatic speaking to good use. He's one of Broadway's biggest hits.

Xigbar, always in denial of his age, became a DJ at a club meant for patrons half his age. His choices in music aren't bad, but they're still trying to get use to the old guy at the turntables. He also picked back up his 'boogie board' and began surfing once more. Due to his manipulation over space, he wins all contests.

Xaldin decided to use his wind abilities to turn it into energy, and became extremely rich by starting his own wind and solar power companies. He plans to convert the entire world and thus reduce the need for oil. He resides in his lavish Kyoto home in Japan.

Vexen joined a team of scientists bound for Antarctica, which suit him perfectly. He grew accustomed to the penguin there and even named a few. His favorite was a chick he helped raise named Oliver (he got misty eyes when it was time to say farewell). He decided to stay on with the team of scientists though and returns to Antarctica every year to continue research (and check in on Oliver).

Lexaeaus became a club bouncer at the very same club Xigbar works at. He's had to throw a drunken Axel out quite a few times. And even Luxord, for being overly persistent in hitting on reluctant girls.

Zexion started college and works part time as a library assistant. He's majoring in Psychology. He plans to write a slew of self-help books, get quick rich, and retire at a young age. He has the first two chapters written thus far.

Just living next to Xemnas was more trouble than Saix could stand. The man was overly raucous (probably on purpose) and finally he caved and let him move back in (didn't have the funds to just move away). He's a college professor at Zexion's school He's failing Zexion in his musical theory class (who knew the boy disliked music so much?).

Axel never could make up his mind on what he wanted to do, and thus drifts from job to job. Most would say that with his looks and charisma, he should go far, but Axel lacks drive and never liked working the same monotonous schedule of a workplace for any amount of time. He's trying to go into business on his own to start a pizza parlor, and thus also enrolled into Zexion's college. Sadly, he's failing the very business class he needs.

Demyx was able to showcase his talents and was temporarily signed on with such groups as Linkin Park, Breaking Benjamin, even Nickelback. He sang backup for awhile with Chad Kroger before splitting off to try to find his own band mates. Actually…he was kicked out of all three groups. None of them appreciated the fact that when he played his instrument, water soaked everyone. Demyx was always too lazy to properly train himself on how to control his water…

No knowing much about anything else, Luxord and his father opened up a bar. The other Org members sometimes drift in, if Ansem isn't around to chew them out. They're now doing quite well for themselves.

Marluxia was hired on at Vidal Sassoon and his flower hairstyles are the biggest hit in New York fashion shows. On the side, he sells mariju—I mean, marigolds, and other beautiful, unique flower arrangements.

Larxene actually managed to get married, have a child, abuse her husband (yes, not the other way around!), divorce her husband, and was sent to anger management classes because of all of this. When not teaching her daughter Lauren to be a cruel witch as well, she enjoys channeling her strength into demolishing things for the demolition company she works for.

Roxas started school and was adopted in by Axel. Thankfully, he turned sixteen quickly and was able to help pay the bills in lieu of his whimsy 'father'. Roxas is basically the adult of the house.

Xion and Repliku live with Vexen most of the year, but stay with Xemnas and Saix along with Namine whenever Vexen goes off to Antarctica. Saix believes their small two room apartment isn't meant for so many people and _hates _having the kids over. Uncle Xemnas (as they've begun to call him) loves having the children and keeps them entertained by doing one-man shows in the living room.

- - -

Riku kept minimal contact with the others, except for still dating Xion. He wasn't ever a Nobody to begin with and had only joined to keep an eye on them, knowing they harbored a slight fascination with his Keyblader friend.

Speaking of which, he was quite happy to be back on Destiny Island. When he saw his best friend, he gave him a half hug, clapping him on the back. "Hey, I'm actually pretty happy to see you again," he smiled.

"Yeah, you were really gone for a long time Riku! And man, your homework has piled up! I really hope you don't end up failing," Sora babbled.

Riku shrugged. "Eh, I'll manage. Say, where's Kairi?"

"Who?" Sora asked.

Riku narrowed his eyes at him. "Kairi. You know…red hair, seems to really like pink? Gave you that flower good-luck charm? Ya know…Kairi?"

"Ooohh…yeah, that girl keeps bothering me. And she seems to think I'm her _boyfriend. _She's cute and everything, but a girl that good looking has to be taken. Are…are we dating?" Sora had to make sure.

"Uuhh…yeah. Kind of…"

"What?! And I can't remember anything about being with her?! Oh man, I told her to get lost and never annoy me again! She'll never date me now!!" Sora whipped around and ran off down the beach, Riku following behind him.

Off in the shadows, Roxas smirked at Xion. "He who laughs last, laughs loudest," he said to her. She had to smile at that too.

They both left that world to meet Axel on top of the clock tower in Twilight Town, sharing sea-salt ice cream and conversation as was still their tradition.

* * *

And thus, that's it for this story! I have another one in the making (well…kind of…), so be on the lookout for that. It's a bit of a cliché school story with Axel probably being my main character, but meh, I have some ideas planned that I think should make it pretty interesting, ^_^

Alrightie, as always, thank you guys for all of your reviews and stuff! Really appreciate it! Please be kind one last time and drop your final thoughts and comments!

--A.D. Williams


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